Its not so far away
Man made nature
Water colors
Artificial suns
Apartments
The loving arms of hell
I had forgotten the way the waves crash on the shore
Of the outer banks

I live in cities
All the life around me
Is only death

I took a rorshak test
And saw fire
Armies marching
Tinted windows
Kevlar vest
And bullet proof glass
I want to go somewhere again
Where the nature isn't addicted to chemicals

Its not so far away

Where I can watch the crane fly
Over the most tranquil waters
Of my mind

I aspire
To nothing higher
Than to bring light into your world
A fire
Out of control
That keeps you warm

I want to be your favorite song
Because you know that I was written for you

I become
Not a strum from some guitar
But chords in your mind I play with
Sweet music
I cannot help but create
To let you know that you are loved

I want you to be my biggest fan
Because it matters if you sing along

Walking drearily again
Half drunk
Dumb destinatiom
Watching the cars ride by
This empty highway of life
And directions we are going
I have my peace
I have happiness I can reach
I smile through suffering
And laugh at my demons
They could never scare me
I'm only afraid
Of my own ghost
I have my peace

I have my peace

But I would risk it
Only for the chance
For the truth loving you brings
And the joy of you loving me

I'm the one
The only one
Who found shade
On the surface of the sun
Let these fires not burn me
But as well
I'm the one
Who made the stars
Into stairs
And step by step
Reach oblivion
And fall in heavy
Let this darkness hold me
Let it speak my name
And let me hear

How can I love something
The way I love myself?
You were the one to show me
And I'll be forever grateful

You've heard my songs
And they made you sing
I took my off my shoes
And you did too

******* it how I love you!!!!!!

I feel I could walk on water
Because I have to
I'll be a feather on the wind
Following currents
That lead me to you
I know I can't walk on water
But I have to try
I'll be ****** sinking
To the ocean floor
Still dreaming of you

My bonnie lies over the ocean

Victoria
She will be my Julie
Its just a matter of time
And all my effort
And all my love
Gloria
We correspond in letters
I hold them in my hands
As though I hold her in my arms
She is my music

My bonnie lies over the ocean

So I'll swim

My perfect meter
Is a haiku when I want
To write a haiku

Iambic pentameter that I write
So often goes unnoticed by you all

Dachtyl meter
Trochee meter
Even lord Byron's
Anapest meter

And then there is meter I invent
Sent to my soul
From the stars
But always very rhythmic
Read it aloud
You'll hear my voice
Through my words.

Icarus will learn
To not fly too close to the sun
Only when the beads of sweat
Are mixing with the melted wax
Dripping down his youthful back
Icarus will learn
To not fly higher than he should
Only when his fragile wings
His hopes and dreams have failed him
And he is falling from the sky
Icarus will learn
Of this I'm sure
But he'll only learn
When it's way to late
And the mistakes he made
Can't be fixed
Icarus will learn
But it won't matter

Who knows how forever feels?
I know of never
With its devils pitchfork
Its reapers scythe
Its demons howl
Its a shadow grown long
Covering worlds
Who knows how forever feels?
The closest I got
Was a very long time
                                                                     I know of endings

I dreamt of you
Without falling asleep
As strange as that may seem
In fact
I dreamt of you
As only I could dream
While being awake

You as a layman
May never experience this
And it is most likely
You won't
But
If you ever catch on fire
Remember the three rules I speak of now
1.stop
          Don't panic, realize your situation, and that you can be okay though calm, concerted effort, don't run! Running only creates oxygen to fuel the flame
2.drop
         Fall to the floor, even the very act of being on the floor smothers whatever part of you that is burning that hits the floor. And it is necessary to be on the floor to achieve the most important lesson being taught within my words
3.telephone
          Now that you are on the floor, pull out your telephone. Strike a pose, and take a selfie. Because for gods sake you are on fire, and you know that it can go viral. And really, dying by burning to death is worth it if you are able to entertain someone in doing so. Instagram will go crazy over you

And I suppose step four would be after you have a picture you like, then  roll to put the fire out. But most people never make it this far.

He was a warrior
As were the rest
But of his skill with swords
He beat the best
And he would gladly charge into battle anytime
For the glory
Of the kingdom,
He was a friend of mine
And always he shall be
Even though his words have gone
He still fights beside me
Because this fallen Knight is a legend
To be told of
Again and again,
He was a fighter
And a lover
A soldier
And a brother
Who stared at enemy lines outnumbered
And held his sword
Up high

He vowed to me
The king
That he would fight by my side
Eternally

Let us not forget him
Let us celebrate his name

Slowly rolling oblivion
Something in my world has happened
Still I'm unsure what it is
And I'm unsure what it means
I know I saw the face
Of a ghost
Holding hopes of ever after
Something to make my day seem strange
I couldn't tell you what it is
I couldn't tell myself
But I know the ghost
Saw me

At the age of twenty one I was folding
I had no plans
And my dreams
Caused me pain
And how many times before
I bend and never break
Never with a plan

I built for myself
A way to escape
Origami wings
Beautiful
And useless

I couldn't play the cards I was dealt
I was folding
Under stress
And hands of strangers
And all my many folds
Create something meaningful
I've become a paper crane

Folding chairs
And folding tables
Origami wings
Beautiful
But useless

This is not my poem
It's my problem
Like solving equations
Using alien numbers
And imaginary math
I have so many things to do today
And I don't want to do anything
But its okay
I learned long ago to not complain
Nobody really cares about your problems anyway
And no man should spend all his time *******
Leave that to the dogs
I just need to focus

Find an outside source of strength
And combine it with my inner
Count my blessings
I have many
More to come
I'm in good humor
I'm a loaded rifle
And I'm aiming at the world
But someone will speak
And I'll slip into a dream
I could never focus
My laser beam

It's my problem

I'll cry a little dream for you
And wish on stars that can't escape black holes  
I'll love the way you fall
As I light a candle just to put it out
I'll see you in strangers on the street
As my mind hallucinates
I'll burn my crooked fingers
Trying only to hold misguided fire
I'll take ***-shots at the moon
Trying to **** it
And then I'll blame myself
When its there again tomorrow night
I'll see all the beauty
And feel its not meant for me
I'll feel all the pain
Of the thousand men who loved you before
I'll look at my skin
And only see marks you've left on me
I'll be selfish
When I don't deserve a thing
                         I'll start to see
                         It was never about me anyways
                         Feeding all my love to a void
                         Just trying to feel
                         Like it could be

Why are the most beautiful things
Always so fragile?
I couldn't hold the flower in my hands
Without breaking it

Well I picture something broken
With something beautiful
Growing out of it

Why is it a field full of hyacinths
Trampled by beast?
I couldn't walk through this field
Without crushing everything

Still I picture something broken
With something beautiful
Growing out of it

Why is it a world of wrecking *****
And you a heart of glass?
My love was always made of ghosts
And my heart made of stone

I was just a brute
Too caught up in my own pain
To see you were hurting too

They say the day is fading away
All we see is all we know
They think were sinking on the brink

There's nothing new
Nothing to prove
Two thousand years
Does our pain now turn to joy?

There is no more
Genius
There is no hope
For changes

In the morning
Symbolic of my life
When its been a long night
And even friends became stranger
I hear the alarm
That is bird song
Drift along the current
And ringing in my ears

Why don't I sing instead?

In the morning
Still before the sun rises
Before the poison aims for my heart
And even strangers are my friends
I hear the shrill
You call bird song
Pounding in my brain
Keeping me awake

why don't I sing instead?
Why don't I sing to them?

And anyways
I've got a beautiful voice

*but I'm tired

Let me publish some droll
For the peons
Simplicity for simpletons
Opiates for the masses
Because I'm utmost aware
If I speak to higher truths
No one will listen
No one wants to hear

The truth is a scary thing
But
So is love
And so is loneliness

Let me dumb it down
So even the clowns
Not good enough for center stage
In the three ring circus of life
Will heed my words
As something they can understand
That my words won't be lost
On them

Its either be good
Of be good at it
And few in this world
Can do both

So don't you be angry
If I say
I doubt that you can

It was an instruction
Struck forth
At the beginning of time
By the very force we'll never understand
The force that is the energy
Of our souls
It was direction given
Just in the patterns
Of the universe
Which repeat time and time again
When time does not exist
The beginning is the end
And it is the ultimate truth
We try to deny
Out of our fears
Or our lack of understanding
Out of the false belief
We were born to suffer

A simple truth.....

No matter who you are
Or what your looking for
Or how you feel
There is a place that you were meant to be

You weren't created for no reason
You were created for me
**And I
Was made for you

Now it is
And I should be glad
But I didn't become the king
By being content with what I had
All this land
Is my own
My castle walls
My throne

So look up
Because that's what I'll be next
Not a ruler of the land
But a ruler of the sky
I'll be a god
Divine decree
And all these souls
Will worship me

Just look up
To the stars
The brightest one you see
Is me
Just look up
To the sun
Its my benevolent light
Always shining

Now it is
Now I am
Forever

With every new love we find
We find an example from the past
How even the age of reason
Couldn't find a way to last
For every Henry the eigth
There is a Queen Elizabeth
For every war on earth
There was a war in heaven

And I want my history to be
The pax romana
But my boundaries will cease to grow
And I know
If I want to be who I'm meant to be
I'll have to fight some more
I'll send my mental legions
To the fore

Because try as we might
In different lives
We've all been here before
It was always a lesson learned

It was always
And it was never
It was forever
It was forever

Sweet baby Jane
Sweet angel with no halo
I find myself lost
Without you
And its always better this way
Its never what we choose
I'll forever be true
I'll forever love you

But these wolves in the night
Hammerhead sharks
Vampires
And empty streets

It was always
And it was never
It was forever
Forever love

Sweet baby Jane
If you go away
I'll be lost in the woods
Without a light
And the wolves closing in
And me not knowing
If I should give up
Or if I should fight

But these shadows in the dark
These haunting demons
Poltergeist
And restless oceans

It was always

Somehow
Tonight
I know she's dreaming
Walking with me through the mountains
Of our minds
Hand in hand in peace
Not in a cold sweat
Waking up
In between nightmares
With glowing red eyes
And razor sharp teeth
All those demons
Have forgotten her name
Because angels guard her
I know what little light
I have
Has been given to her
It shines on her soul
And she sees the colors
Royal purples
Smiling yellows
Passionate reds
And tranquil blues
Hand in hand in peace
She walks with me
Through forests of loving greens

And just like always
She'll wake up in tears

I know she'll wake up in tears
Of joy

The whole world
Loves a lover
A lover loves
When all the love is gone
All I want
Is that my hands
And my words
Can touch you
Like no one else's can

I want to love you
I don't want to be a clone
I'm worried I'm a ghost
That feels alive
A young mans blues
A folk song

The whole world
Loves a lover
A beautiful heart
A martyr
All I want
Is I'm there
In you're dreams
In my dreams
That I see you

And everything I see
Is in love with me

White
Refracted rainbows
Symbol of light
I hold in my soul
Black
The lack of all color
Black and black only
Most of her life

I asked my love her favorite color

The reds and the blues
She loved as a child
The royal purple
The forest green
I woke up from a dream
Where a man was telling me
That love is all you need
To be happy

I asked my love her favorite color
And she said that she had none

I'm trying to tell you something
I don't know how
But there is water in the desert
There are cities full of ilife
And stop signs and green lights
I don't know how
Still amidst the sand storms
I'm trying to tell you something

I'm trying to show you something
I don't know how
Because words are only sound
Even if they come as music
A symphony of movement
And every action is
I don't know how
Who I really am
I'm trying to show you something

Well it's a history of changes
Still it's our history of changes
So maybe tomorrow
We will Change for the better

Song bird
I ask for nothing more
Than that if you sing
You sing for me
A sweet lullaby
To help me sleep
Song bird
Your feathers may be torn
And you can hardly fly
But the notes you reach
Still reach me
I'll never leave your nest
Song bird
I am but a crow
With blackness in my soul
But I feel alright
Within your gentle melody
I feel your light
Song bird
I hope that you don't mind
If I sing along
All out of tune
I find hope inside your song
A place where I belong

Song bird
Would you sing a song
About love
Because thats all I'm thinking of
Ill be your greatest audience
You'll be my peace of mind
Song bird
There is nothing more beautiful in the world

Love
Just like eyes
A world away in the stars
Words in the sky
Hearts in the night
This life is a moment
A way to remember
I know the sea
I say the moon
I have sun hands
Maybe waves of light

Things fall in the ocean
Rain falls on the lost

Comes a small day
People feel blue skies forever
Time took a left
I touch a mind
I hear summer air
I think about a girl
Who looked to be breaking
But when the earth is gone
She'll finally whisper

"Despite the pain
My soul walks in dreams"

Only when I have hope
Does my mouth become a fountain
In central Rome
Fed by aqueducts
As ancient as memory
Only when I have hope
That the water in my words
Will make you want to swim
That you'll be wet
With the feeling that I give you
Only when I have hope
                     Hope only you can give me
Only when I have hope
Does my mouth become an ocean
My thoughts are rising tides
Youre standing on a beach
And my waves will reach you

But right now
Im in a desert
Dying of thirst
          And water
Is but a bitter memory

I'm worried I've lost my hope
                          Hope only you can give me

Deep water
Let me swim
Night sky
Let me fly
Flower
Let me bloom
Into you

I love the lake
The haunting song of the loon
I love the moon
If its new or a fool
I love the rose
And the way the thorns cut me
I love

Deep water
Let me drink
Night sky
Be my star
Flower
Let me grow
Into you

I love the ocean
The waves on the shore
The riptides
The sharks
The sunken ships
The lost sailors
I love the ocean
I love

Deep water
Let me drown
Into you

Your weakness
Your nightmares
Your demons chasing you
Through netherworlds
Blame it on me

And you woke up
By punching yourself
In the eye
And now your scars are even greater
Blame it on me

Your loss
Your sorrow
Your fear
Your tomorrow
Blame it on me

And you said
The most beautiful things
I fell in love
And I loved you like no one else could
Blame it on me

Because I am weak
Even when I am strong
You saved me once
And all I could do was save you
I guess I didn't

Blame it on me

I hear the stories
Of attempted suicide
And I fail to comprehend
                   If your looking for the end
You're going to find

And maybe that's why
I've never tried it
Because I was always too good
                   At killing myself

And as these words are written
I am dead
But by tomorrow
I'll be alive again

I'll be alive for you

Tell me what you want
I'll bleed but not bleed out
I'll find a way to live
When you stab me in the heart
I'll find a way to dance
Without you
And still wish that where you are
You're dancing too
Woman, it's all my impossible soul

Tell me where you went
And why your so afraid
Do you want to love?
Do you want to love me more?
If I couldn't sing
I'd still find a way to say
My beautiful heart
My impossible soul
Woman, it's not so impossible

I jump off bridges
I tie a noose around my neck
I throw my self at walls
Hoping that I'll stick
I jump off cliffs
I take handfuls of pills
I drive into trees
Crash at eighty-miles-per-hour

I cut myself
Because you bleed

I breath in poison
I lock myself in my garage
And turn on the car
I suffer the fumes undiluted
My shotgun savior
I ask the bullet for any answer
I sit in silence
I look for endings

I
Cut
Myself
Because
You
Bleed

That old laughing man
So convinced he is a mountain
And doesn't see how time erodes
How weathered roads are beaten
Under the calamitous hammer of tires
And fall into disrepair
Or how piece by piece
The sands on the beach
Melt into the sea
And islands sink
I've seen the lunatic
Wether on the hill
Or in my heart
Or as blurry words
Scribbled and read by drunken eyes
And he was always dancing in my mind
Dancing into the fire
And unaware
Of the way hell burns

The king
Sits alone
In his castle
Singing songs
For no one
Waiting on his queen
To come home
And be
With him

His armies march
They fight wars
In her honor
Swords unsheathed
In strange lands
Just to bring her home again

The king
Doesn't cry
But if he ever did
It would be for her
For her loneliness
And for his
Singing songs for no one
And still hoping
She can hear

She should know
How much
She is loved

I only look for peace
Or at least a little relief
While I write love letters to ghost
And kick a can down the street
I only look
For what can't be found
I say to much
Because I fear the silence
The magic is penniless
The logic is cruel and unkind
The tragedy unfolds
And I play my part
I only look for peace
But I'm on fire
And I like it
And you fuel it
If you want to watch me burn
You can
I'm sure I'll be nothing but ash
In the morning

And then I'll have my peace
I'll be the ghost to reach you
A haunting bitter truth
You'll never forget

I still write you
As a part of everything
A thousand characters
With the same heart in my mind
This heart of mine
Beats in time with yours
You'll be my everything
My ceilings and my floors
And my bed
Where I fall asleep to dream
You'll be my love
My understanding of god

Dearest Zelda
I could give my life
And it never could be as much
As you deserve
So I'll give you the next one
I'll give you all the stars I come from

I still dream you
I still am thankful
You found a way to save me
When nothing ever could
The beginning and the end
Of everything
I love you
I am you
And we are the rain
Born from our tears before
We fall together
Holding hands

Sweet Isabella
I keep on throwing parties
That I can't enjoy
Because you're not there
And one day I won't need wine to drink
One day I won't need drugs to get high

I may be great
Gatsby dies for Daisy
My soul can't be complete
If not for you
Its as though our broken pieces
Put together make a perfect whole

I hope you hear the hopes in my words
That they speak to you
I hope you feel the sorrow in my handwriting
That I'm not with you now

Whatever you believe is beautiful to me
I love even your scars
I would eat your pain
I would fight your demons
And walk with you through your nightmares
I feel your sorrow lil ma
And I give as much as I can
To change that sorrow into joy
That pain into pleasure

No respect
None given
What isn't earned
Is not deserved
And you can think
Your **** don't stink
But the truth is that it does

No respect
Only lies
I see through veils
And darkest nights
You can always play
What you want to be
It will never change who you are

Snake charmer
Fire alarm
Doomed by karma
Attempted dissarmer
Of the man
Who holds the ultimate weapon

The truth

No respect
None given
Your fallacy
I will not believe
And if your point is to prove
I'll prove it to you
You should never have ****** with me

Cold in the morning, warm in the night
Flowers in bloom, a beautiful sight
Skyscrapers and stadiums up, dilapidated apartments down
And no one seems to know their way around these highways
Bitten by panthers, stung by hornets
Digging for coal, but still finding love
A goldrush, a coin that someone had tossed
We send our hospitality to you
Spray cans in the night, a message in the morning
I only hope the words I say, say something to her
When the thing that we believe in, are things that we imagine
I imagine a king who wears a crown
The first time I lost, the first time I loved
The first man to play the way that he does, a warrior
Parking lots with sleeping cars, and highways full of life
And the mayor is at war with the state
Words I've never heard before, I couldn't know you and not love you
But somehow the dragon, he dances before we do
And all the kings men, London bridge is burning down
An invitation to a party
Just a state line, another division
That I'll never reach, when someone else does
A highway in the sky, a highway wrapped around the city
It could never take me where I need to go

A darkness you don't want to see
The harshness of reality
When everything happens for a reason
Even my pain
A black mass
Behind a mask
These stars
These scars
And I'm digging my own grave
Because nothings going to save me
And if I'm going down
I don't want to take you with me

Abstract and surreal
Still
Something you can see
With your own
However many eyes

Patters emerge

And these steps lead to
Where
This beak is just a tail
My face
In a mirror ball

And misunderstood

Still it is art
In its highest form

I have nothing to say
But I'll say it anyway
Only in hopes
That you will hear me
I have no color
A black and white sketch
Without meaning
Full of feeling

I don't know what is real
Anymore

Says the ocean
Says the shore
Says me drowning
On the ocean floor
The tides were always rising
And the islands slowly sinking

I don't have much to say
So I'll invent a new excuse
To reach out
And try to touch you
I have no breath
Its only death
Permeating my bones
Still I live on

I don't care what is real
Anymore

Says the demon
Says the darkness
Says the Angel
Trying to save me
The love was always real
When its nothing I could feel

I was struggling to stay on my feet
But the thing that kept me going
Was a dream
That I would dance with you one day
I was falling with every step I took
But I always took another
Because if I can't move forward
I knew I would never reach you
I'm
Reaching
Still
Stuck in darkest night
Knowing there's a light
I was trapped inside a nightmare
But my words were talking to a dream
With the thought that we'll be happy
That we would dance together
In the sunshine and the rain
We will be laughing
And the blue in your eyes
Is the blue in mine
And when we look at each other
We only see ourselves
I'm
Looking
Still
When I probably shouldn't
But I just can't help it

Let my blue eyes fall on you
No matter who I see
Nothing more beautiful
Nothing I'd rather be
And nothing can come between

There is Molly from Raleigh
A girl who's always jolly
But I see that she is crazy
She told me that I'm normal
And threw meaningless color onto canvas

Jenny from charlotte
Truth is she's a harlot
She'll say what you want to hear
Feign love when it's quite clear
She only wants your body

Ashley from Asheville
A hippy singing songs
And playing tambourines
And hitting the ****
But maybe not too smart

Lets not forget
There is Elizabeth
She's somewhere in china
She didn't want to leave
But I told her that she should

And then there is you
You know who you are
No problem too great
No distance to far
Because I believe enough to make it be