I never speak loud enough
and my words are consistently twisted
by the poison in my tongue
before they escape my mouth
and the things that I say are often
misinterpreted in the worst possible manner
when all I really ever meant to say
was that I love you
and I really hope that you love me too
but the words came too quietly,
too softly from my terrified lips
which scarce part to make way for the syllables
that were not meant to come out
and
you told me I was too clingy, too soon
too possessive and too paranoid
but I just didn't want the soul that I love
to scatter into ashes and leave me alone
again

Do you know that I am human?
I am not a nothing
That is behind your phone screen
When you text me
I am a real person
With emotions and feelings
Do you know that I am not a toy?
I’m not just some game
That you play on your computer
I am a real person
With a heart and a mind
That is tortured every time
It is treated like a nothing
Do you know that I am not a robot?
I can’t just be entertained one day
And forgotten the next
Without extreme consequences
Unlike a robot
I have needs
I have wants
My heart is left to rot
Every time it is abandoned past recall
I think sometimes
Our society is overrun by technology
We forget how to be human beings
We forget how to treat one another
We get lost in the chaos
And instead of finding ourselves
In someone else
We end up making enemies
Rather than friends

The shine of the blade,
The slice of a knife,
What a double- edged sword,
to end a depressed life

The magnificent red liquid,
Falling to the floor,
What a glorious night,
To knock on hell's door

No whimpers or pleads,
No hello's or goodbyes,
No regret or sorrow,
Not even a cry

My heart is replaced,
With a dark, miserable hole,
That once had held,
A daring soul

For I have seen,
The reality of life,
Soon to be ended,
By a beauitful knife