be gentle with yourself;

your scars tell a story;
of survival;
of bravery;
of a new frontier;

your wounds will heal;
it may take some time;
but those scars are important roadmaps
to your body;

be gentle with yourself

if i had it all figured out;
i’d bring you in closer;
i wouldn’t push you away;
my dearest lover;

with the moonlight pouring;
we’d dance until morning;
to a love that is soaring;
as we stroll along the street

my heart beats triumphantly;
at what it has found;
it has been decades;
since it has skipped a beat;
since my breath caught;
since i tripped over words;
since butterflies in my stomach;

and through all this, i say:
thank you

in a circle, they chant, “something wicked this way comes”

they are correct;
i am wicked;
and i am coming;

i arise from the ember and ashes;
teeth like fangs;
claws as fingers;

i wield power spoken true by revenge as they whisper, “now you become chaos. you are destruction.”

finally, i speak:
”who’s next?”

i would like to rise;
high above the alcove;
towards the swirling blue sky;
beyond the clouds and mist;

i want to touch the moon;
and taste the stars;
live in constellations;
and sleep beneath galaxies;

who shall I share this dark abyss with?

i am the vessel that carries my grief;
you come in waves;

you are a familiar scent that comes from nowhere but lingers for just a moment;
you are a slight, cool breeze that grazes my forehead when i’m warm and cozy in bed;

14 years later, i fear that i’ll lose the sound of your voice (i haven’t);
i fear that i’ll lose the sight of your luminous smile (i haven’t);
i feel you.

though your footprints cease to exist on this earthly realm, you transcend time and space;
if i had known that the last time i hugged you would be the last time, i would’ve held on a little tighter.
if only, if only, if only.

i am persephone in red;
i cannot be touched;
i cannot be reached;
i am the cold that settles in to your bones;
i am the earth that you so brazenly walk upon;
i am an incandescent body of light in the night sky;
i am dauntless;
you will never see me coming.