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When we remove the flowery, decorative adjectives,
In every love songs we listen to,
There we’ll find that every lines the world gives,
It says the same thing,
Over and over again,
Like thunder whispering upon our ears,

“Love me,”
“Why can’t it be me?”
“I love you,”
“Do you feel the same way, too?”
“Please,”
“Choose me.”

Desperate as it sounds,
The truth really may punch you through your guts,
Seeping through your veins,
Letting the blood drip,
From your broken heart,
I want you to know you don’t have to do that.

You don’t have to plead,
On your knees,
Your palms down,
No, not like that,
Put your head up and say,
“It has always been me.”
I need you to hold my hand,
i need you to hold me,
i need you to count my tears
one,two or upto infinity,
i need you to place my random thoughts in a band,
i need you to make me move,
from the sadness grove,
i need you to represent my myself,
i need you because i dont want to fail,
i need you to help me fresh air  inhale,
i need you to talk and share,
i need you because i want to complete my prayer,
to the god to make every thing all right,
i need you in my every fight,
i need you to love my scars,
i need you in my empty sky as shining stars,
i need you to bring the solitude of aticate,
i need you as my best friend,
i need you as my all above,
i need you as my luck and love.
I feel like if I don't write things down,
I will forget.
I will forget all of the foolish things I've smiled about.
All of the things I've talked about
and the things I've been told.
Everything I've cried about.
All of my high school memories.
What I've laughed about until my stomach hurt.
Things that I've learned.
Acquaintances.
How I fell in love.
Things that I've favored.
Books that I've read.
Pictures that I've taken.
Places that I've been to.
I'll even forget writing this poem.
I'm going to forget all of these things
and I won't even know that I'm forgetting.
It's quite sad how that connection always lasts.
It could be days, weeks, months.
But it's as if we start right where we left off.
Like an unfinished autobiography.
As soon as a word comes out of the other's mouth,
we can't help but smile at one another.
As if there wasn't a tragedy that went on between us.
It's been a week.
And I know it will be there the next time we see each other.
But I fear the day that the connection between us ceases to exist.
i watched you change right before my eyes
it was the most painful thing to see
so gradual i barely noticed the difference at the time
but now i see it clearly

perfect is what you were
we took a wrong turn
is that what landed you here?
how am i still sane?
why didn't i change?
can you not see all that is wrong?
i we wish could rewind to the crossroad,
but even with faith it seems impossible

you will never be him again
we will not replay
repeat
but God, i wish we could
even if it meant breaking my heart again
June 19th, 2014 10pm
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