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The Black Beast May 2013
Happiness
Having a good health
And having a bad memory
The Black Beast May 2013
I seem to remember everything
Even what i want forgotten

Even what i want hidden
Even what i want destroyed

And i remember those more
Than i do the beauties

Those God given moments
That i will never truly forget

But now i can't distinguish
Between the Goods and Bads

The Love and Fear
The truth behind my broken heart

The truth that never hides
And i want it forgotten
The Black Beast Mar 2020
Candle 1

Part 1

A lonely standing candle
Burning slow and dancing free.
It flickers light across the room
On a naked, you and me.

Our eyes are locked together,
Shadows dancing everywhere.
I lightly graze your cheekbone
As I brush aside your hair.

Your lips quiver in waiting,
Sending shivers to your toes.
Your breath begins to quicken
As our distance starts to close.

Oxytocin fills your body
And you feel yourself set free
As you feel my lips make contact,
And surrender yours to me.

Part 2

Soft and warm as candlelight.
Moist as summer rain.
Our lips divide for one last breath
Before they join again.

A rush now overcomes us
As they merge together fast.
Our teeth, like little soldiers
As our tongues race to get past.

Your arms grab my head tightly
As they don't want me to leave.
My beard tickles you slightly
As our heads just bob and weave.

As the candle wick burns lower,
My lips lower down your skin.
First the neck and then the chest.
Let the escapade begin.

Part 3

With my lips above your cleavage
My hands graze along your side,
'Til they softly cup your *******,
Which are beautiful and wide.

You feel a soft massage start as
Your underboob is tight.
My lips stil slowly falling
'Til your ******* are in sight.

Your fingers knotted in my hair,
Your legs around my waist.
As my tongue begins to circle
Before getting its first taste.

A quiet moan as my lips kiss
And **** upon your nips.
A few more moments, then it's time
To move down to your hips.

Part 4

This candle, nearly finished,
So, the lower I must get.
Your leg lock loosens on me
As you start to pant and sweat.

It starts with long sweet kisses,
Then a jiggle of the ****.
As my arms lock round your thighs and
Pull my face right into it.

My fingers spread you open
As I take on one last breath.
And dive in to taste the sweet treat,
'Til ****** or death.

A loud moan and long shiver
As my tongue now finds its mark.
And so, the candle burns away,
With us breathless in the dark.



Candle 2

Part 1

You light a second candle
And announce that it's my turn.
That I should lay upon my back
And let this candle this burn.

This view of you beside the light,
I simply, cannot speak.
My eyes and jaw snap open as
My muscles all fall weak.

Half lit by waltzing ambers, while,
The shadows claim the rest.
Not to jump up now and take you
Is a difficult request.

My time to wait is over as
You join me on the floor.
Making sure that as you fall our
Yearning lips collide once more.

Part 2

The wave of kissing deepens.
Your hand scrapes me as it falls.
First, my chest, and then my abs,
And then it ends up on my *****.

Our mouths pay no attention to
What's happening below.
As your hand now grips my shaft and
Starts the rhythm off real slow.

My wood becomes pure iron as
I feel your tempo surge.
And my breath becomes more stuttered
As you hold me on the verge.

You kindly ease down on your pace
And pull from one last kiss.
And as your head gets lower down
I know I'll enjoy this.

Part 3

You lick along the shaft and then
You loosen up your grip,
As your eyes engage my member
And you spit upon the tip.

Your mouth now claims it's dinner
As you gobble up my taint
And the sudden ******* motion
Makes me start to feel all faint

The slurping noises louden as
Your neck goes to and fro
With each mouthful getting deeper
As you find a steady flow.

My fingers link around your hair.
Your throat feels my quick ******.
Then while you gag and catch your breath
You turn and then adjust

Part 4

Your lip service keeps coming
As you keep your stable pace.
The only difference now is that
You're sitting on my face.

My mouth now back to action as
My tongue begins to weave.
My hands spread your cheeks open so
My nose has space to breathe.

Your flattened ******* lay dormant as
Your **** now starts to twerk.
And you grind your **** pumpum
Over one ecstatic smirk.

Our need for foreplay, over,
As we finish on our snack,
As the candle wax runs empty and
The room returns to black



Candle 3

Part 1

I vanish in the darkness and
You roll onto your spine.
You hear the sound of a match strike,
And see the candle shine.

You see me jump towards you as
You spread your legs apart.
You giggle as you clearly see
I cannot wait to start.

Your lips begin to open as
My tip begins to breach.
My arms hold on your waist as you
Soon lose the skill of speech.

The steadfast pump continues with
No need to yet go fast.
Let us endure every moment
As we feel each second last.

Part 2

Your eagerness is striking as
You push me to the ground.
As you start the task of riding
And regain the gift of sound.

Your moaning echoes round us as
You struggle to pronounce,
Now your pace sets out to quicken
And your ******* commence to bounce.

As your stamina decreases you
Decide to turn about.
And you pull a full 180
Without letting me slip out.

You then continue bouncing with
More power in each ******.
As our minds are lost to time and
Our control is lost to lust.

Part 3

I sternly lean you forward then
I kneel behind your rear.
Quickly getting back to business
But I take it up a gear.

I hold on tightly with both hands.
You feel me deep inside.
As your ******* hang low and jiggle on
With each and every stride.

Your head now rests on your crossed arms.
No strength to hold your pose.
As the ramming still continues
In the dimly lit shadows.

Our breaths are long and staggered with
Our bodies drenched in sweat.
So I choose to change position as
It isn't over yet.

Part 4

I lift you to the wall and hold
My fingers to your throat,
As I resume the insertion
And your brain begins to float.

A gasp of air revives you as
My hand loosens its grip.
But an intense rush consumes you
As you start to twitch and drip.

I let you sit upon the floor
And offer out my *****.
You swiftly take it in your mouth
And suckle on this load.

A ****** overcomes me and
I blow inside your jaw.
As the light begins to flicker
And the candle burns no more.



Candle 4

Part 1

The final wick ignited as
Together, we lay still.
The time of action, over as
We both have had our fill.

Our ribcages expanding as
Our lungs almost break out.
Overworked and undernourished as
We rest from our workout.

Your head is resting on my arm,
Your eyes stare at my chest.
They mark out a new spot for you
To use as an armrest.

A light cascade of fingertips
Caress across my side
As your hand takes its position
At the place that you had eyed.

Part 2

I see your cheeky smile as
I feel your tickle too
As i let out a quick giggle
And then try to tickle you.

A quick under and over as
Your hand comes up to block
Within moments it is over
As our fingers clasp and lock.

A sudden change of vibe now as
Our pupils lock as one.
As we both, within this moment,
Have been hit with shock and stun.

Our heads both drawn together as
We again lose control.
As our lips are reunited
And our tongues start their patrol.

Part 3

With our bodies spent and aching
The smooch doesn't last too long
As you lift your head and smile at
The thought of nothing wrong

I can see the candle dancing as
Your eyes reflect its glow
As our hands continue clutching as
We both will not let go.

My brain records this moment that
I never will forget.
How beautiful you look right now
Still covered in your sweat.

You rest your head below my neck,
An ear upon my frame.
As you listen to my heartbeat
And you hear it call your name.

Part 4

Your eyelids start to weaken and
Your breaths start to extend
Soon you feel your body slipping
And your consciousness, transcend.

A light snore soon escapes you and
I cannot help but grin,
As I don't want to disturb you
As you sleep upon my skin.

My arm is dead and stinging so
I try to change my stance.
I slide it out as I try not
To wake you up by chance.

I cuddle up beside you as
The room goes void of light.
I kiss your hair and then I wish
Sweet dreams for you tonight.
The Black Beast Nov 2022
Its cold and its raining
But you've asked to meet once more
I will show up and be there for you
But this has happened before

I'm in the cab and on my way
You let the grateful thanks pour
"(You) couldn't cope without (me)"
But you've said that before

I'm nearly there, but you stop texting
I arrive cold and wet at your door
No answer to my knock, text or call
But you've done this before

The river flowing down the road
As I treat this curb like the shore
Taking a seat with my feet in the ocean
But I've sat here before

An hour has passed and now I must go
I'm soaked and blue to the core
Next time ... next time I'll make it you faster
But we've ... I've been here before
The Black Beast Apr 2014
All alone, All alone
Fighting evil, All alone
Fighting 'til I'm skin and bone
All alone, All alone

All alone, All alone
I look around, I'm All alone
'Friends' around have all but shown
I'm All alone. All Alone
The Black Beast Mar 2013
A million tears won’t bring you back,
I know because I’ve cried,
A million pleas won’t bring you back,
I know because I’ve tried,
A million tales won’t bring you back
I know because I’ve lied
A million moans won’t bring you back
I know because I’ve sighed
A million thoughts won’t bring you back
I know because I’m tied
A million deaths won’t bring you back
I know because I’ve died
The Black Beast Dec 2013
Reliving the silence of sound
Headphones in
Gossip out
Just focusing on the reactions and lips of society as they talk
Converse
Switch information from one person to another
Something I don't do much of anymore

I try to keep it bottled in
Bottled up
Away from the world
I'm no longer part of this place
I feel like an outcast
As I cast out all of the others

Sense turns to nonsense
Altogether to all alone
I enjoy it though
Enjoying the pain
Knowing its not fun
Just the opposite
Lonely
Boring
Quiet

Great
The Black Beast Jul 2017
Again without control
Again now filled with fear
Waiting for the nurse to call
"Is Michael Hibbs still here?"

Just waiting for the cannula
Just waiting for the bed
Again I fight against the
Ticking clock within my head

I wish to skip a fortnight
I wish to close my eyes
And wake up in a time where
The light of joy will rise

Just wake up when it's over
Just wake up when it's done
I wish to not know what happens
Just that I know I won

Again I stand a captive
Waiting to be free
To wake up as someone else
Is truly the wish for me
Got admitted into hospital (again) with a phobia of needles. Every morning bloods are due and the anticipation got to me.
The Black Beast Jan 2017
How sad a world would be
If we had one second chance
Fail twice and that would mean
No way to now advance

Come in once late to work
And now your warning is acquired
Turn up late again and well
Pack up your things, you're fired

Miss that book deal deadline twice
Time to find a new career
After every small mistake
You would live in constant fear

But as I sit and ponder
How sad this life would be
I can't stop thinking of the pain
That you have caused to me

The seventh time you broke my heart
The hundredth time you lied
In a world of second chances
I could push you to the side

In a world of second chances
We'd be forced to stay apart
And now you could no longer toy
With my damaged broken heart

A world of second chances
Would spare me all this pain
But I guess I'll give you another shot
For you to break my heart again.
The Black Beast Mar 2013
Just when things get back on track
Just when all cards are in the pack
When all the games are good and done
Another starts and makes me run

I cant escape this losing streak
I can’t escape because I’m weak
I want to win and finish life
Without the pain and grief and strife
The Black Beast Apr 2013
ME:
A long dark day precedes a long dark night
I've lost to fear, I've lost to freight
Come courage, stength, or even might
I've lost the battle. No will to fight

TR:
Until the day of battles Dawn,
Where we fight together in this war.
For our fallen brothers we shall mourn,
And pray that tomorrow will bring something more.

ME:
But as fighting lives, our brothers die.
Come sword or bow, our time is nigh,
The one escape, towards the sky.
We must craft wings, that we may fly

TR:
When that day comes, we shall escape this torment,
And begin our own ethereal accent.
Until that time brother, we know only death,
But we shall fight until the very last breath.

ME:
But if we escape, is there such thing as life?
Or will it forever be pain and strife?
Until the day of the reaper's scythe,
We shall be mated with a clock as our wife.

TR:
Death is absolute,
Live on dear brother light comes,
Fight until dawn breaks.

ME:
Lights of hope, or lights of fire?
Glowing deep within desire.
The wants and needs of our bodies expire,
As I'm left to hang on a double-striped* wire
*'Double-striped' as a reference from Wreck-It Ralphk, able to break and disappear instantaneously

Look up The Raccoon, inspirational poet on here
The Black Beast Apr 2013
The rain from above
The wind in the trees
What a beautiful day
With a beautiful breeze
The Black Beast Jul 2013
I used to be a rhyming poet
I never seemed to like the ones
That carried on without a beat
That felt as steady as the runs

I used to be a constant eater
Never fussy with my food
Come rain or shine or thunderous bursts
I'd eat regardless of my mood

I used to also be in love
She used to tell me so was she
We used to walk from here to there
I used to feel like I was free

But now i'm changing
I don't need a beat
No rhymes
No constant thinking how it will end
Sometimes its better pledging forward

Like pledging through a filled up fridge
Looking
Refusing
Whatever I can eat I won't
Because I don't fancy eating today

And Love
Well, that's simple
I lost her through my own doing
Left here to walk alone
But now
By the image of my past
I'm trapped
The Black Beast Feb 2014
Those years ago when I'd cry to mum
Because the bullies picked on me
They called me smelly, silly, dumb
And when the teachers came they'd flee

They said "Crying wolf is is wrong and bad
The more you lie, the less we'll aid"
That drove me crazy, drove me mad
And I swore that I would make the grade

I said "No more crying in the school"
I said "No more bullies pushing through"
I would be no longer, a smelly fool
This was my chance to start anew

So sure enough, the boys returned
And sure enough they said their piece
The emotion inside me had learned
That fighting was the way to peace

I made a name for myself those years
And all around me learnt the cost
If you came to me in search of tears
My friend, you had already lost

The need to prove myself was there
It made me free from pain and grip
It had its downs, but the ups were fair
I studied so I'd never dip

But as the years came floating by
My name had disappeared for good
I was just the boy who used to cry
Who'd fight you whenever he could

The anger that had now controlled me
Needed to rebuild my fame
And as I saw an old arch enemy
I'd already become too wild to tame

And as I, in the gutter laid broken, numb
And all the others walked away
I realised I'm smelly, silly, dumb
But this time theres no-one to say
The Black Beast Apr 2013
For once I'm seeing facts, no idealistic thoughts
The dreams continue
Staying awake is the only way to stay safe
I know I want her
Need her
But I can't show her
It's not what she needs
So it's not what I want

Risking upsetting her
Something I rarely want to do
Rarely can do
And it tears me apart as I want an unachievable status
Happiness with her

But that's a contradiction
Her being happy
And her being with me
They can't happen at the same time
And her coming happy comes before me being happy


And it always will
The Black Beast Mar 2013
Watching those two
Happiness and Envy
The green-eyed monster attacks me
And I am left defenseless against a force I will never attack

The smiles and cuddles
The trust and passion,
I wish I could console them all within my heart and life
But I cannot get grip
I cannot hold on to the sparks of my former self’s heart
And I am left as cold as the unlit fireplace

But something stirs
The spark within myself is starting to reheat my body
To reheat the passion and trust I once had
Then it hits me

The fact that I cannot truly love
That I cannot truly have passion
I cannot truly be in love
Because I cannot be loved

This hideous monster
The thing many hearts have wisely shut out
The thing that loves like a hunchback Quasimodo
And needs its Esmerelda to set it free from its isolation and pain

But she is long in the future
And all I can do is wait
Wait through the pain of happiness
And the pain of envy
The green-eyed monster attacks me
And I am left defenseless against a force I will never attack
The Black Beast Jul 2014
The single wave
That drowns a man
Will end the time he thought would last
He, now a slave,
To the almighty plan
And only God knows his dice are cast
The Black Beast Apr 2013
The smiles on my face hardly show whats inside
The laugh
The grin
The slowly fading smile
They show the happiness that i do not possess

This happiness
Created
Morphed
Twisted for the good and satisfaction of others
But inside
The pain and sadness are uncontrollable

Yeah,
I can control the outside
I've learnt that trick
So teachers and friends stop the questions
The reflective comments
Which lead me into a world of pain and sadness
The world where my inside comes out
The world where shrinks and counsellors analyse
Debate
And break the vows of privacy, which they swear to, for our own safety

I'd rather be hurting in silence anyway
I'd rather that than complain
Bringing others down
No need
No point
No reason to upset the people of today
With the problems
Struggles
Battles of my heart and mind

But sooner or later
It always shows
The true feelings of mine
Hidden on a daily basis
Hidden for the protection of others
But eventually they take breathe
Like a drowning whale after a long deep swim

When i'm alone
When i have time to think
And no-one to help me stop
Thats when the pains show themselves
To me
To anyone around that cares
So, to no-one else
Because no-one cares

And so,
Like a prophesied event,
A prophesied lifestyle of choice and regret,
The pain of love
The ever known 'rhetorical'
Just simply wins again
The Black Beast Feb 2015
I used to be an angry kid. I'd fight you if you wanted fun.
But as life lingered on, I stopped. And look at what I am today.
I stopped the fights because I'd lose. Afraid of confrontation since.
Because of peace I've lost my heart. I wish I'd fought for you to stay!
Two years later and still my mistake haunts me.
Too Little, Too Late, Aye?
The Black Beast Aug 2013
Fool me once shame on me
Fool me twice shame on you
This, the phrase I’ll never say
Despite the pain it puts me through

I’ll always be the one left back
I’ll always be the silly one
I wish that I could just one time
Be the one that has sometimes won

Sometime won the lovers fight
Sometime won the hearts true goal
Not be the fool, who is fooled again
And keeps the shame within his soul

I need to show her that shes bad
I need to let my feelings loose
But how, oh how, will that ever be
When what I want seems so obtuse

So big, so large, a stupid goal
Where scoring will not ever be.
Fool me once shame on me
Fool me twice, still, shame on me!
The Black Beast May 2013
You swore to secrecy

You declared that you would tell no-one
Especially not her
The one I said that needed never to hear of it

You tell her of my secrets
And come apologizing
Come begging my forgiveness
Thinking that you have done wrong
And telling me of your sorrow

But there is one flaw to your flaw
One slight misreading of the situation
That you must have simply overlooked
Simply not realised because you trusted me
Trusted me as if I truly trusted you
I trust no-one in this life
And this is why

I knew you'd tell her
Why do you think I told you?
I wanted her to know
But i could never have been the one
The one to break the bad news

That would be vile of me
So I told you and made you swear not to tell her
And you fell for the trap I hoped you would

So ask yourself who really is guilty?
The Black Beast Oct 2013
It's been a while since we've last spoke
Since I heard your gentle advice beam
It feels as if I've just awoke
From something of a vivid dream

We used to talk, but once a day
And make all of our problems clear
I guess that I've got naught to say
So I'll put this out, that you may hear

I miss the times of good and bad
I miss the times of problem share
The advice I'd (badly) try to add
The constant thought that you were there

I'll start at quick as it seemed to end
I'll jump straight back with eager cue
But my tongue is stuck, my dear old friend
So I guess for now its "hi, how are you?"
I can wait for a reply as only time can tell.
The Black Beast Jan 2022
I know that you've forgiven him,
For beating you at first,
For choking you against that wall,
In that violent outburst.

I've heard you justify his rage,
And play down his abuse,
"He'd had a rough upbringing"
But I reject that excuse!

You say "It only happened once",
You say "I made a stand",
But since that day I see new marks,
And imagine his backhand.

I know that you still love him,
And you've sacrificed so much,
But I fear the day his actions,
Leave you walking with a crutch.

I fear the day he breaks your spirit,
The day he breaks your arm,
The day that its too late to help,
To stop him causing harm.

I know you'd never testify,
Which leaves me with one choice.
To break the one you love because
You will not use your voice.

I know you'll hate and disown me,
You'll scream and push and shove.
Forever I will wait for you
To forgive me too, my love.
The Black Beast Apr 2015
Would you rather start the day with a smile
And risk the chance of it getting broken?
Or would you start the day with a frown
Praying that there will be someone to fix it?
If
The Black Beast Aug 2013
If
If you can’t trust your foremost-born son
But think of him as if he doesn’t care
If you can’t see the damage, been done
And carry on as if it’s yours to bear
If you can’t see the truth laid before you
But see the story filled with lies
And think that all the pain is for you
And think that you’re the one that cries

If you can’t see the innocent parties
Before you push away all hope
Before you chew them down – like smarties
Then leave and slowly start to lope
If you can’t see the fear you produce
In those that want and need you near
If you can’t hear the silence let loose
Nor see the dry and shriveled tear

If you can’t stop and change the angle
If you can’t see another’s side
If you can’t let your mind untangle
And push your twisted thoughts aside
If you can’t see a loyal person
If you can’t feel the prayers and blessings
Then that is why it will always worsen
As blindness will stop your life progressing

If you can’t see a family, loyal
If you can’t see someone to trust
None of us are godlike – royal
But we are all still faithful, just
If you can’t feel the help we offer

And realise what you truly had
You’ll lose it all to the garden coffer
Except the love I have for you, dad
Schizophrenia has finally taken him away and all we can do is hope that he sees the love
The Black Beast Mar 2013
The autumn days where leaves are red
All on the floor so nicely spread
Were when I first had seen through eye
Her beauty as she walked straight by.
On Halloween where all saw dread
When little kids went all to tread
That’s when my heart wanted to try
And introduce by saying hi

Three months went past and winter came
As snowflakes drop not two the same
It was now that id start to sigh
Until I rose a man on high
Now at the time of Christmas fame
Where Santa comes and knows your name
She came to me with Christmas pie
Then I announced my love – no lie

Then in the spring with plants and birds
With many flocks, with many herds
On that green hill we’d talk and lie
Just nodding and not asking why
That beauty scene no way to word
The fields splitting to perfect thirds
‘Twas then I wished that I could fly
But no, we’d heard her time was nigh

The summer heat roasting us all
With often winds keeping us cool
It came about that she would die
And no-one there could stop my cry
While some were at the swimming pool
And some were shopping at the mall
My bleeding veins were turning dry
There in the grave lay her and I.
The Black Beast Jul 2013
I was alone
With no partner
But I was happy

And then I met you

I had a friend
A new found mate
If only for a short while
As it grew past friendship

The feelings grew
The passion started
And we were together in 'love'

But sadly love never dies
So as the feelings left you
They attached themselves to me

I
Now stronger in love
And you
Have simply forgotten

And now I am alone
As you share the love you once had for me
With him

And I am left to bear the love
The pain
The loneliness

I am alone
With no partner
But now I am sad

Because i met you
The Black Beast Jun 2016
As day begins my thoughts are clear,
I wonder if she is has awoke?
A morning text, but what to say?
"I Love You" or a ****** joke?

You make me smile, you make me warm,
You make me feel so rich and free.
You're beautiful in every way,
Except that you're too good for me.

You say you're not, I know you are,
I'm told it every day for starts.
The man in the mirror reminds me each day,
"The only pro of you is darts"

"You're sloppy, ugly, ******, dumb
Your character is weak and stale.
She's gonna realise today
That she deserves a better male"

If I wanted the best for you,
I'd walk away and leave you be.
You'd have a so-much better life
If not for the problem, me.

But I don't want the best for you,
I want to keep you near and close.
This warm and fuzzy, heart addiction
I think I've had an overdose.

I'd used to want to give my life
To make all of yours dreams come true.
But the pain of leaving is too high a price.
I'm selfish and I'm using you.
I don't deserve you
The Black Beast Feb 2019
She's the white to my black
The fun to my gloom
The beauty to my roughness
The redemption to my doom

She's the day to my night
The horse to my cart
The answer to my question
And the key to my heart

She's what I wish I had
And who I wish to be
But as clear as all our differences
She's not the girl for me

She's my antonym
And I'm drawn to her glee
But since she's my opposite
She can't be drawn to me
The Black Beast Apr 2013
I saw your eyes.
My heart was struck
With a glory of love and peace
That sanctified moment I’ve kept until now

I stood back
Hoping you’d notice me
Hoping that what they said about true love
Was true

One day I was told that angels were on clouds
That heaven was a place above the sky
Hidden behind the clouds above me
And I was beneath it

But I was alright here
I was at a safe place
I was above sadness

But I was below happiness with you
I couldn’t ever be happy here
I realised that I couldn’t stay here for much longer

I had to jump
To reach you
To reach love
In hope of finding it
But this view of true love wasn’t true

You pushed me off
Let me drop
That you could lie with him
That vile thing which searches for lust
A demon
Like you are now

Now im falling
And have passed that level of safety I was once on
Falling lower and lower
Eventually I will reach the bottom
The bottom of the eternal fall
Turning evil from within
Joining him
Joining you

But this time it will be against my will
I will hate the thought of it
As I hate the thought of falling now
And that sanctified moment
Which I kept from the very moment I met you
Will be
Is being
Has been destroyed
The Black Beast Mar 2013
I woke up this morning and thought of my friend,
And I thought of the day we had planned,
Everything just made sense, but little I knew,
Of the day and its troubles at hand.

I met her at 12 on the hour exact,
And we started to chat as we left,
We talked about jobs and stereotypes,
Hinting about things other than theft.

As the day passed us by I started to feel
Something growing from inside my soul
I woke up thinking of her as a friend,
But now shed become my hearts goal.

I had always noticed her beautiful face,
But as we walked for mile upon mile,
I started to see that I like her a bit,
And that I love her beautiful smile.
The Black Beast Apr 2013
The eternal lie filled fact,
That all fall for at some time or other
which is
Love

I’ve learnt that it hurts
That it is a lie
But others have not
And I cannot see why they carry on
Trying to win
The useless game of
Love

I’ve learnt about hoping
Jumping for the best
And falling below satisfaction
To a point of pain and despair
But I’ve learnt how to carry on
How to slowly crawl back up to the safe place
Away from the painful myth of
Love

And every time I regret it
The jump that caused the fall
The pain, the destruction within me
Caused by something else,
Love

But I am not like the others
I can realise the stupid fact
I’m addicted to the jumping
The hoping for a better place and feeling
The need of feeling better within myself
And making them feel better too,
Love

I need that feeling
I know the pains and lies
But I want to win the unbeatable game
To be higher than now
Higher than I’ve ever been
On a wonderful set
Love

Yet I am also clever enough to see
To see that what goes up
Has to come down
And will carry on down until rock bottom
Just to fall again, further down
And all because of that faithful jump
That leap of unnecessary need
Love

Not this time
It won’t happen again
I want it to
And I don’t want it to
I want the perks
But the contract is flawed
Made for the personal satisfaction of the others
Love

This time I can guarantee
I’m jumping for something I can
Something that I can achieve
Something that is not too hopeless
Something where I can be happy
And not feel the drop
The ultimate low
Love

This is different
I can feel it literally leaving my veins as I speak
This really isn’t like love
Unlike anything I’ve ever felt
Even different than the living of this discontinued life
Death
The Black Beast Dec 2013
Life just carries on when you cant carry any more

Life fights against you even when you give up fighting

Life will glue the shattered pieces and pretend its new
The Black Beast Mar 2015
You stood there and smiled
And the more you smiled
The more my soul glowed
Like a Firefly at night
------------------------------------
I expected you to share yours
But you took off your shoes
And as you gave them to me
You went to dance with him

I gave you my soul
You gave me your sole
The Black Beast Nov 2020
COVID.
Another reason to lock the doors and die alone
The Black Beast Feb 2015
Regret is now all that I have

As you were once all that I had
two years too long
The Black Beast Mar 2013
A long dark day precedes a long dark night
Ive lost to fear, ive lost to freight
Come courage or strength or even might
Ive lost the battle, no will to fight.
The Black Beast Apr 2013
The double from bell
The double from *****
The start of a vision
The end of a lose
The Black Beast Apr 2013
‘Love’ is just a made up word
But the feeling which is defined by love
That is something more than four letters
More than two vowels and two consonants
More than anything that can be described with words

Then why is it so hard to keep it in?
Why do I have to cause troubles and problems
When I have to verbally announce the feeling of …
… Of it
… Of ‘love’
Of the feeling deep inside that cannot be worded.
Yet needs the presence of wordings and descriptions
To keep it going
To keep it living

To keep me crying
The Black Beast Jun 2015
As I played chess today the thought of love
Went through my head as if meant to be
At first the pawns (the smiles and looks)
Begin the game that now gripped me

Next was my knight (the brave young chap,
That asked if we’d be more than friends)
I’d need the rook (to go straight to the point)
But the knight was helpful for getting round bends

The bishop (in my dreams at least,
Would wed us so we’d never part)
And the queen (most powerful by far)
Would stand beside the king’s strong heart

They all worked as one, but pieces lost
To save the queen, the pawns were slain
(The smiles, gestures all now gone)
Which then began the losing chain

The rooks destroyed (left me indirect)
And soon the knights had even passed
The strength that stayed began to crack
As the bishops killed (showed love had passed)

All that remained were the king and queen
Standing together side-by-side
What was left to be done was a “queen to H5”
And they’d live forever as husband and bride

“The love is all gone” she said as she turned
Hiding her face she said “queen to E8”
The enemy pawn (such an evil old gesture)
Took a quick step forward and announced “checkmate”
It's funny how my dad thought I'd made a mistake when I moved the queen :/
The Black Beast Mar 2015
Your smile like the sun
Lighting my way
Showing the path
To love's brightest day

My eyes like the clouds
Pouring out rain
Knowing that you'll
Never love me again
The Black Beast May 2015
We all make mistakes
We all choose a path
But I guess mine will haunt me
As I lay in the bath

As I lay in my bed
As I ride on the bus
This mistake that I speak of
Is the mistake of us

"The way to get over one
Is to get under another"
My mistake that now haunts me
Is 'cause I didn't really love her

I was in love with the first
And then 'liked' the next
I wasn't quite sure
Now I'm truly perplexed

But as the due date approaches
She assured me "it's not yours"
Then tells me to F* off
And closes all the doors

If it's mine I'll accept it
(Though my parents will shout)
It's funny but oh how
I wish I'd pulled out

I'm not ready to father
A child on this Earth
But I guess I'll have no choice
When just after birth

The child comes out with
A darker skin tone
Than the father she claims,
But my seed has been sewn

Only time can convict me
Or clear me of rights.
But until then it will always
Haunt me at the night

But regardless, I proclaim now
That whatever comes
I'll love it if it is mine
(But I'll still hate the mum)
Is it wrong to wish it's not mine?
The Black Beast Mar 2013
My closest friend, my trusted mate,
Good times have come and gone,
And even though you lie there still,
I promise I’ll stay strong.

I promise that I’ll climb that tree,
And paint that fence green too,
And then I’ll go and make that ramp,
Just like we said we’d do.

I’ll stand up to them big bullies,
‘coz you’ll be by my side,
We’ll show them who the chickens are,
And take away their pride.

And by the way I brought you these,
My dad said that I could,
I brought you these new fizzy sweets,
They really do taste good.

They all tell me that you have gone,
That you’ve gone far away,
But I know that you’re buried here,
And they’ll learn that one day.

I really do miss you, you know,
I wish you didn’t die,
I wish that we had much more time,
I’ve got to go now. Bye.
The Black Beast Apr 2013
My love for you
Is strong and grand
And yet it makes me
Weak and bland

My love for you
Is pure and clear
And makes me feel
No 'mild' fear

My love for you
Has been opaque
But yet feels like
My worst mistake
The Black Beast Sep 2016
That mid-April morning, back in 1995
I came into this world with the help to survive
Protected from harm, even against my own will
Encouraged to prosper and not to stay still

I see posts that say "My mum is a queen"
"My mum's the best mum the world's ever seen"
I'm not saying they're wrong, or that I disagree
But my mum is the reason that I became me

Yeah, she's made some mistakes out of anger or fear
But whenever I'm troubled, she lends me her ear
She showed me her belief and gave me her trust
As I make new choices, she helps me adjust

I'm glad to be me and having her makes me proud
She's brought sunshine to me when the world brought me cloud
Now, she has her ways that would drive you all mad
But she's the best **** mum that I could have had
The Black Beast Mar 2013
My unknowing wife my unknowing bride
I’ve dreamt of approaching and asking thee
If ever a time you’d be by my side
And oh if ever there could be a we
I’ve dreamt of a day that mine would be yours
I’ve dreamt of that time when I’ll take a knee
I’ve dreamt of that walk through those old church doors
I’ve dreamt of a time that baby makes three
I’m dreaming of things I know won’t come true
I’m dreaming of times that I know won’t be
The dream of a life that I have with you
The chance of a spouse I no longer see
Now that I’ve awoken I now agree
The dream of this world is just not for me
The Black Beast Mar 2015
You lie naked beside me

You tell me you love me
You tell me you're proud of me
You say you'll never leave me
..............................................................­....
But you did leave me
But you hid me from all
But you never loved me

You lied naked beside me
The Black Beast Jul 2013
The ways of the world
Make way for my death
Now
The Black Beast Mar 2013
Now
Sometimes I sit and wonder if any of this is worth it any more
I’ll sit and think of the bad times that have been
Usually think about the bad time that is happening
And I’ll always think of the bad times to come

It used to be times of golden happiness
Times of gladness and times less vain
But now it seems to be times of suffering
Of regret and now of pain
The Black Beast Sep 2019
Let Cupid leave me be today
Aim not for me, but far away
Unfog my heart or hit her too
Release me from this state of blue

You know not of the pain you make
Nor of the dreams of joy you take
Presenting the thought of a happy end
And then I awake at the wall of 'friend'

Redraw your bow, you little ****
**** me now and finish it
Enjoy your fame and all your pride
Remiss of all the tears I've cried
#acrostic
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