For once I'm seeing facts, no idealistic thoughts
The dreams continue
Staying awake is the only way to stay safe
I know I want her
Need her
But I can't show her
It's not what she needs
So it's not what I want

Risking upsetting her
Something I rarely want to do
Rarely can do
And it tears me apart as I want an unachievable status
Happiness with her

But that's a contradiction
Her being happy
And her being with me
They can't happen at the same time
And her coming happy comes before me being happy


And it always will