I use substances
To plan an escape
To run away
With not even moving
Turn off my mind
My brain gets loud
All the wrongs I have done
All the times I was let down
I feel everything, and everything and everything
I leave these emotions, these pieces of my history
Safe
Hidden behind, humour, hidden behind, lust, hidden behind, trust
I feel everything
And most of the time I want it to stop
And I fill up that cup
Take one more shot
Because everything I got
Reminds me of what I am not