HOSPITAL. HOSPITAL. TAKE ME TO A HOSPITAL.
MY BLOOD'S ALL UP IN CLOTS.
AND MY STOMACH'S TIED IN KNOTS.

HOSPITAL. HOSPITAL. TAKE ME TO A HOSPITAL.
I'M SICK AND TIRED OF YOU BEING LATE.
I USED TO THINK YOU MADE ME FEEL LIKE LIGHTWEIGHT

i want to take Polaroid pictures of you in my t-shirts brushing your hair all the while you are unaware

i want to burn down the buildings of everyone who's ever hurt you

i want to hold your hands in mine and kiss your cheeks and all the little places no one ever has

I can't even think about waiting to kiss you without replaying the thoughts of him in my head.
I think about you all the time but he always gets in the way.
And I am so ******* tired of having to deal with the feeling of his hands scratching down my back and his words whispering in my ear.

He's left these scars on my chest, these memories, these marks.

I lay down on my bed and think of you but all I see is him.
Every person I pass by is suddenly him.
I try to explain how we can't even have *** with the light on because then it becomes too real. I relive the past and I ****** into a pit of tears as you hold me telling everything will be okay.

How do you know that? How can you be so sure? How can I ever really be with you if when I look into your eyes I see his.

Monarch butterflies
have never seen their own wings.
They are not away of how beautiful they really are.
I guess that's like thinking your whole life you're a moth when really you're this ******* amazing, graceful creature.

Sometimes I think we may be butterflies.

I'm pretty sure that if I tried hard enough I could pin point the exact moment when I started to question wether or not I deserved to live.
It must have been a 4am phone call
Where I missed you, but you were there and I was here.
And the sun began to rise but yet I had no desire to move without you here with me.
It feels like universes away until I can fit your little hands in mine.
There are these things I feared to say and things I feared to do.
I do not love him.
But he was just so conveniently here, when you weren't.