'DON'T GRAB MY APPLE DUMPLINGS

OR MY SWEET CHERRY TWIST.

YOU'RE A LEWD, CRUDE DESPICABLE DUDE

AND A FAT MISOGYNIST.'



"HEY, I'M A BIG STAR AND CAVIAR

WITH MELONS ARE DELICIOUS.

IF GIRLS WON'T TRY MY PUMPKIN PIE

THEY'RE LESBIAN AND MALICIOUS."




'YOU'VE GOT A NASTY HABIT

AND IT MUST BE OVERCOME.

THAT'S MY LUNCH BOX DON'T YOU GRAB IT!'

SAID THE DONNA TO THE DON.




"YES, I'M A BIG STAR AND I'VE COME FAR

YOUR RAMBUTAN LOOKS DELICIOUS.

IF YOU WON'T TRY MY PECAN PIE

YOU'RE PREMENSTRUAL AND CAPRICIOUS."




'FORBIDDEN FRUIT'S RESTRICTED

SO EXERCISE RESTRAINT,

OR I'LL GRAB YOUR WALNUT CLUSTERS HARD

AND YOU'LL TURN BLUE AND FAINT.'





(If you're a bit slow then see below

and follow this helpful strategy.

Simply substitute any mention of fruit

with words from 'Reproductive Anatomy').




Miriam Troth 2016