Another teary Christmas Eve just passes,
as she watches the world,
some soon hold dear Christmas masses,
through her cars side window,
as the cold air just stirs,
& the engine just purrs,
on down roads she's been down too many times,
as church bells again chime,

In darkest slate blue and grey streaked skies,
against a stark white cloudscape
across her glassy mirrored eyes,

Her eyes fill as she remembers,
the argument before dinner,
& then after,
and there is never really a "winner",

She's not ever comprehending,
the why???

Back home,
& living a lie,
sitting at her stool,
her head in her hand,
& she feels such a fool,
her feet and mind exhausted,
she's emotionally drained,

Things are more than just strained,
her heart more than just pained,

Then he hears her voice CRACK
though doesn't acknowledge her pain
he gently stokes the fire,
she cries alone,
in vain,
but he is not stoking theirs,

He let that die out a while ago,
as if he couldn't care,
& she knows she should go,
still she doesn't dare,
& she doesn't seem to know,

How???

As another tear
                             D
                                 R
                                   O
                                       P
F
   a
      l
        l
          s
           plays on the radio,

She sits in silent sadness,
this is her teary Christmas,
when others surrounded by gladness,

How many melancholic Christmases,
that she just drowns in,
must she endure???

The elusive happiness she once knew,

Left right along there with you.

Cherie Nolan © 2016