It wasn't funny,
I'd used every spare sock.

Every newspaper that had past my letter box..

I couldn't use my ******* magazine
           as the pages had mysteriously



stuck together??

So I walked like a crab
         into my back garden..

My hose pipe connected,

I know how Sylvester Stallone felt
            In demolition man,
            three sea shells..

              F##k this S##t,
but no morality machine
for spare sheets....

F#########ck....

Ok lets get the water pressure just right,

I turn it on and my ***** swing like a pendulum.
               dam that made my eyes water..

This time I put it in the right place,
a unique sensation,
                but just as I was clean,

my back porch light turned on..

All I heard was,

"Frank don't worry its cold,

As he laughed out loud.

I walked back in my ***** sore,
                                   but **** fresh clean,

even though embarrassed..