i still remember the first time i texted
988
i was in the 6th grade
crying
holding a Swiss army knife
bleeding
from my shoulders and wrists
and heart

it was 2 in the morning
i was in my room
they gave me a list of reasons of why i shouldn't
it didn't stop me from trying

one week later
i texted again
same story
then the next week
then the next
they started to recognize my number
they remembered my name
every time
i haven't texted them in a while
i wonder if they miss me
i wonder if they're happy i haven't

i kind of miss them