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softcomponent Sep 2014
I thought of her-- image and all--
inner monologue running thru my
head as my retinas crawled through
-out the desert-- and imagined, realized,
saw I was no longer in love-- what she
had done made her seem like an anybody
passing the trainspot platform with nothing
but a sideways glance. All whilst my eyes
established themselves to the Cinecenta screen,
Lawrence of Arabia bathing in masochism and
blood, the evil of insanity, and admittance: "even
worse, I enjoyed it."

even worse, there are some who enjoy it,
killing their darlings.
softcomponent Sep 2014
the amount of traffic on any given street is a laughably proclaimed quid pro quo sputtered by a drunk university third year major in philosophy-- taking the room as his own outer brain-- leveling it with the assumption: 'this is how exciting it is to be alive... rooms are the physical manifestation of the categorical imperative.'
softcomponent Sep 2014
taking government loans, parental guidelines
and flashy dress-skirts made this life unfact
and unfiction. Lost in the disabled returns on
tax dividends, the world kept calling your name.
“Rise up and be born with me, brother” Pablo
Neruda inclined-- “Give me your hand from the deep  
Zone seeded by your sorrow.”
it all it all it all ached,
an abyss of patience with nothing-- a droplet of sidelined
coffee given sentience with ingestion-- all the banal all
the mundane all the flowing rock-face moments so
presented by society-- in my heart of hearts, in my mind
of minds, in my eye of eyes, in my neck of necks, I found pain....
the ache of achey betrayal and the ache of achey loss. In this
pain we find repreive from Pollyanna-- reprieve from the false
Gods of Evil, the Devil Within your Ex-Girlfriend-- the reason
she let his ******* inside. Through all the latency-- through
starving streetless sleepless evenings-turned-to-nights I could
see death within the sliver of a flashlight beam.. telling me to
take the life or leave the life but never in-between-- telling me
the pain was part and parcel to the ecstasy of faith and resurrection--
screaming “FLATLINED IF YOU WANT, FASTLINED IN YOU
WANT, SIDELINED IF YOU WANT, STREETLIGHT IF YOU
WANT” and throughout this evil and this darkness and this nothing
-but-a-flashlight-beam, I hear Neruda--

*“Rise up and be born with me, brother.”
softcomponent Sep 2014
it's night now
and events have stopped.

Stillness evades the froth of evening
calm leather moves none under the fabric.

This home -- older than our world -- flushed
with wisdom -- flushed with glee -- flushed
with the violent storm of transience and
correction -- eyesight jiggled and adjusted
for new intentions -- meaning frisked for
rocks on a Boeing --

it's night now
and events have stopped.

you have stopped.

I have stopped.
softcomponent Aug 2014
you were the diamond on the truck-stop floor. the hiss of sparked ignitions wafted through your mind, sandy and confused-- meaningless, like cake crumbs. cake crumbs you swept up and all, for what?

the little green man inside your hypocrisy (disguised as paradox) hid away.. feeling deeper and deeper into the recesses of flesh you once called home.

there had been a time. of course, we all know time is linear, and all that is linear must soon and completely find halt within eternity.. as if the dribble of a drain makes a marble of the ocean.. as if a handful of ocean ice water will diminish the intensity of the seven seas at their largest... as if a sky full of rain and a raindrop full of see and be seen is really much more than you're looking at.

I took my own hand this time, skipping down the trail. it was overcast and foggy. Melancholy rested in the air and on the dew of the leaves, I was thirsty and pooled it to the middle of a particular green, drinking like a bowl from the Jungle Book. All I could taste was white wine and dandelion bitters. All I could smell was that metallic springtime rainfall smell, the night sauteed in the heat of the morning. The sun now at it's zenith above Honolulu, perhaps.. above Midway, or the Solomon Islands. In my minds eye, I could taste the thirsty coconut milk of Tahiti.

What I saw in the mist, dear Reader, was nothing short of breath. My breath. My breath. My breath. Condensation a frothy steam from teapot of mouth, steeping syntax and semantics into novels of thought all expressed in the limelight of sudden conversation and fitful, rightful, frightening intrigue.

You can never really love enough, can you? You can never truly **** the thought without the thought first taking you.. asking you.. begging you..

thinking and thinking and thinking.....

.. . . .. . . .. . .. . . .... . .          why?

Lawrence,


why?
softcomponent Aug 2014
tp
**** on my nose and question the ethereal depth of my love for Dark Matter.. the beer and the cosmic phenomenon. Ask me why you think we should love one another in the darkest prison, laughing at the ghosts, scoffing at the shadows, screaming in delight: 'depersonalized madness can't hear me now!'

Your pupils are dilated with panic. Too much coffee, you addicted, raging barista-wannabe. Too much indication that the owl whooting WHO is asking, 'who?' Or making reference to the World Health Organization and the spread of Ebola across the western sub-sahara SHUT THE **** UP, OWL, I DON'T WANT TO CONSIDER WHAT ITS LIKE TO BLEED OUT THE EYES.

Drifting along in life, driftwood getting paid to drift along as long as it can stay a bit past nine and help the boss close up shop. Dressing all indifferent as if black Urban Planet pants that require a lint roller are worth the $20 they charged or if the polo shirt you wear was really worth the 80 you spent recklessly when a previous boss hinted you'd breached dress code by showing up shirtless on the very first day.. you ate nothing but Mr Noodles and bruised apples for a week just to help a CEO make bonus on his margins and afford the violent takeover of Exxon Mobile.

SCREECH AND SCREAM LIKE THE RAGING TINNITUS YOU TRY TO DROWN OUT WITH STRANGE SPACE MUSIC from spheric-lounge. Is depression all that bad if cipralex makes your jaw clench as if it were overdosed MDMA? Perhaps I'll feel well on Welbutrin, smell putrid, feel stupid, noticed that my love life is just another betrayal by a loopy cupid, my Lawd.
softcomponent Aug 2014
stove-top percolator sits stove-top *****,
house is a flippant mess of disgust and
attempt. there's a distant whisper of a
yell to somewhere someone else outside,
blinded windows and piquing sunlight
writing lawnmower hums to the conclaves
of covered eardrums and a thought crosses
the mind:

*'stale old coffee and undusted, unswept floors.
life is an attempt to keep the world clean and yet
lose yourself in the rubble *** it seems that all
secret desires crave an unmade bed'
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