Kai - Hello Poetry

Kai Nov 28

$u!c!de

You know, you can't spell $u!c!de without u and I

would you be willing to join me in a double suicide?! - Dazai Osamu from Bungo Stray Dogs

#dazai #bungostraydogs #bungogaydogs

Kai Nov 28

Meow

All you do is run your mouth
You're making everyone's lives go south

All you are is annoying *******
****** cowards
Never crossing the 7 seas
Might as well join the psych ward
Because of how insane y'all are
All bark, no bite
Let's see how you'll fly under the radar
It's quite the sight
Leaving yourself so vulnerable
Making yourself so useless
Making yourself appear disabled
Opening up the list
Naming several reasons why
Making yourself look like a needy ***** that wants attention
None of it is being truthful to the eye
It all looks like you just have an obsession
You're so sensitive that it makes me laugh
You're so annoying that you make me laugh
In pain
Again
While I'm trying not to rip your organs out

So weak yet so slow
You have such weak blows
Every single shot I take
You think I'm at stake
All I say is "What the **** was that?
I couldn't even be hit by a bat?"
Not even a tiny pinch?
Do you even know how to throw a punch?
Can you even try without throwing the same insults every time?
Because you do every time
Find some other insult then return to me
Fix your grammar, then return to me
Okay, old lady?
You probably can't even hear me
You're deaf to a certain degree
You don't even know how to navigate your phone correctly
You don't even know how to navigate your TV correctly (before putting a virus on the ****** device that has to hear your voice)
You really thought you ate
But all you did was eat
And eat
And eat
OH **** THEY ARE ABOUT TO EAT THE WHOLE SOLAR SYSTEM-

Accusing people who have wrongs in the past
Accusing people of their wrongs that happened in the past
Making me seem like I'm not "disturbed"
In your herd
You're making yourself to look like a clown
In it's gown
In a circus tent
With no one else except your little friends inside
You're trying to make yourself so intimidating
But everyone and everything just laughs at your acting
You're trying your hardest to out live us
But you weigh as much as 50 buses

Look at me in my eyes
Why do you even try?

#anger #poem #poetry

Kai Nov 28

Rabbit Hole

I see my life flashing before my eyes
I'm falling into my demise
Deeper into the hole of mysteries
Just like the 7 seas

Endless hole of disaster
Just because of some pranksters
Wanting to see me suffer here
I can't even hear
Because of fast I'm going down this rabbit hole
The hole
I did not wish to suffer through

As much as I try to climb back up
I always manage to start falling back into the hole once again
As I look down, I see many cups
While my ears are in pain
Completely mesmerized
In this mess
Too mesmerized
It's my weakness
Hypnotized
By someone's lifeless corpse
Gently swaying back and forth
Wishing I would be that corpse
First, Second, Third, Fourth
Not paying attention to my surroundings
Never finding any end
Hearing my ears ringing while I hear clocks softly "ding"
No friend
Just me, myself, and I

Could've choose the red
By the stuff I have read
But has chosen to pick the blue
I wish I have thought things through
Stuck in a endless loop
No longer in my group
Wondering if I'll go insane someday
Or if today is the day
Where I finally land on my two feet
Cold with no heat

As the rabbit hole gets deeper
My mind gets deeper
Hearing sharp noise of the wind feels normal
As if I was an animal
Smiling as if I was happy
But I feel so ******
So exhausted
But also timid
Bones feel like noodles but all I can say is "im okay!"
Or "don't worry, I'm okay!"
I can never get out
Watching the lights go out
Trapped inside the hole
Which holds my soul
A player that you can control
"****! You're on a roll!"
Forced to say that every time you knock me into a hard and sharp object

I wish I would've picked the red one

Based off of Mesmerizer with Hatsune Miku and Teto!

#rabbithole #poem #poetry

Nov 27

Liana

Someone is suffering

While I laugh
Someone is crying

While I dance
Someone just found out they lied

While I can't sleep on my bed
Someone wishes they had a blanket

While I eat
Someone starves

While I walk
Someone loses their parent

While I live
Someone dies

When I remember,
I wish them to feel better
I send them some of my momentary joy
Because maybe
That's how miracles are born

I feel bad that I'm the lucky one, so I do what I can even if it does nothing, and is just a small thought

Not one of my best 😬

Kai Nov 27

Toxic mind

"You smell good!"
They know your insecurities, you smell like food

"You can tell me anything, even your insecurities!"
They will just judge you if you tell them anything

"Your hair smells really good."
They know your insecurities, you don't smell good

"You're really smart!"
You aren't smart if you can't answer a single question and need to ask the teacher

"You're a really good artist!"
Next step: "Can you teach me how to draw?/Can you draw me?"

"Your skin tone is really pretty!"
Your skin tone is normal/average

"You don't smell awful!"
They are only feeding your bad habits

"You're pretty!"
Thank you, but what do you want from me?

Everybody just wants something in return, no matter the situation.

meow.

#freestyle #poem #poetry

Kai Nov 27

Conflicted

Lies are all what people tell me
They act like I can barely see
How much lies they tell me

People tell me great stuff about myself
People tell me that I need to appreciate myself
Because of all I do
But, it reminds me what I did to you
It's like my brain
Doesn't want me to obtain
The kind words someone gives me
Instead, I'm supposed to believe that they are simply lying to me
It's just like my heart can't let me be

My brain tells me I need to believe them
While my heart says I can't believe them
Paranoid of what to choose
I chose the *****
I chose to be indecisive
I hate being being indecisive
But that's who I am

I don't know who to believe
Or if I should even leave
And close the curtains
Or just leave the curtains
Alone

I feel like I'm drowning in decisions I don't even mean to make
My life is at stake
Just because of mistakes
I choose to make
Every decision I make comes with bricks
That's one of my conflicts
Bricks always in my palms
I can't always keep calm!
Why can't you people understand that?!

I feel like I'm getting closer to death
Closer...and closer to death
All conflicts are made by my mistakes
Now other's lives are at stake
But am I the person who actually created these *?
Even so
I always say sorry
I say sorry
Too much
All you do is munch
On my apologies
Like you're my allergies
You never forgave me
Don't act like I can't see

I don't even know if I should stop saying sorry
I keep on saying sorry
It feels useless
To not do any less
To do more
But I don't know anymore

I don't know what to do anymore

expect mistakes because I'm tired

#conflicted #poem #poetry

Nov 26

brooklynn

Bee(from 2021)

You change in the snap of a finger
you give pain
with your stinger
you can't see the pain
why can't you see