You know after all I think I never really believed in love or any emotion at all.

That’s quite hard to admit that I was so broken that I never let it in properly. I never accept it either.

I think that all those emotions are inside of me I just don’t let other seeing it because I don’t want anyone to be able to hurt me. What I realized is that hurt is uninvatable and it’s part of this beautiful life.

I am sick of hiding my emotions like nothing hurt me. I am not afraid anymore because I prefer to get hurt than to feel nothing at all.

So I am going to danse until I can’t feel my feet, I will sing until I loose my voice, I will eat until I can’t see food anymore, I will cry in front of romantic film until my eye explode and i will love just to get hurt. Because if I keep not feeling anything at all I will loose the best part of myself.
^^

I would like to fall in love the way I fall asleep.

First I feel dizzy, I want to close my eye so badly and let go of any tension.

Then come the dark and yet I feel so confident and safe

And I start dreaming like everything is possible.

I wish I fall in love the way I fall asleep.

Oh yes sure, but as friend then?
- Why would you say that?

- Remember talking about respect when you wanted to fight?

This is also to me the only thing that makes me angry and want to fight. As you, I have a high respect of myself and don't like to feel ignore, disrespected. It might be a big word just to explain that i don't appreciate when someone read my messages and decide not to reply.

Listen, it's not against you, i understand, you are busy, I might not be your priority. But i learn over the past year not to let anyone taking the chance to be able to hurt me. You might not be the kind of guys who like texting fine, then you should have tell me (same way as you asked me why i left and i replied).

It was really nice meeting you, i would love to see you again but not without disrespecting myself. That's a lot of feeling, but after what i saw in you, I am sure you will understand. I am free tomorrow, if you understand that we can meet. If not i want to tell you that i also feel this connexion and wish you a beautiful week.

--
Self respect is a high value i want to keep. I am mature enough and have been hurt enough not to let anyone getting this power over me.

Some people talk to you in their free time and some free their time to talk to you, i am learning the difference and i am looking to let people in my life only with the second option.

If you are able to rise you standard to meet girls like me.

I am listening to love songs
And I don’t feel sad
Like I finally realized that it’s a beautiful thing the world has to offer
I was never ready for it
I always push it away to protect myself from pain
And I realized that I always finished to get attach and somehow fall in love and finally get hurt.

I don’t want to refused the good feeling anymore. I will just keep in mine at the end it will always hurt and that will be enough protection.

Now that my heart is free
I actually feel much more better toward you
And I think I would have to thank you to open my eyes and my heart to the greatest gift humans can get : LOVE.

You show me it was possible, even if I believe that you always lied, your lies stayed in me like something I have to follow.

It’s weird how I hated you so much for putting those felling into me and now that I am free of any relationship I think you did good.

I believe that two souls never meet for nothing, there is always a reason. I now found why I met you. I was thinking it was a bad experience but I now think that it was needed.

I am tired of falling in love
I sick of covering up
Seems that for staying safe I should change and become something that’s not me
But I was always taught to be myself
I am my own independence, the reason I am smiling in the morning
Who I am need to be enough
—
We can do anything, just run away with me
Put your hands into mine and let’s be each other everything
Give me your heart I promise I won’t break it
—
I want to sing and dance and feel beautiful

Why everybody always think they know me? Like they are mediums, as they know what I think or want or have been through... but I only show what I want them to see.

No you don’t know me! No one does. And i would not be saying neither that I do know you.
—-
Eveytime I am nice it’s not me hiding my emotions it’s me dealing with the devil in you.

What should I do ? Insult you and telling you I am hurt and that I hate you for what you did to me ?

This is not the person I want to be or Even is. You don’t know me!

If I react well when you rejected me it’s because at least your have been sincere and respectful and I respect that enough not to get angry or even sad.

If I get angry or sad who that will help: you surely to see that your actions have effect on other: but you alredy know that when you did. You knew it will hurt me anyway.

If you did it you have your reasons and I respect it!