It's been
1,987,200 seconds
33,120 minutes
552 hours
23 days
3 weeks and 2 days
6.28% of 2024
without you
The world becomes quiet, yet hustling
It's like the space and time is warped
everything seems small and suffocating
Most of the time, I am fine
Not remembering is fine
Ignorance make me alright
But every now and then
You come pop in my head just like that
And I'm back to square one
Rejecting any food
Cannot smile
Chaos intensify
World falling apart
Grieving for the living
Attending the burial of sweetness
Everything we built, you built
I crashed it like a car
It's been
1,987,200 seconds
33,120 minutes
552 hours
23 days
3 weeks and 2 days
6.28% of 2024
yet I'm back again to the first morning
without you
So I'm telling myself
Of those 1039 days...I'm letting go
I'm letting you go
Step by step
One second at a time...
Everytime I can't help thinking about you, about us, I end up in the hospital. Its been 3 times now. I don't mean to make you worry. Tho I'm not sure you even care to at this point. Ive been obsessively checking up on you. Just to know you were right again and again. That you'll be fine too. You know how to deal with this the healthy way. You always have people that can coax you. Some games you can play. Partners you can eat with. And I only have you. It was us that brought me to life again. Someone told me there's no more "us". The perfume of our poem seems abrupt, yet the scent lingers around. I still feel as if youre comforting me. The memory of you helping me get through this. With your words, like you used to. I know it's for the best. It's just my fate to succumb. It will pass, and sometimes love aren't meant to last. Just so you know, I will always love you. Even if for you, it was me who leave. Again, I am sorry. It's for you. And for me. I had to be the bigger person, and the mature one, like I always have to. One day, when you finally become a man you will understand.