if someone tells me that jealousy does not exist
on this earth
i will tell them to look deep
inside my heart
and see the jealousy that courses through my veins
i yearn for someone to talk to
even if it's just a random person anonymously on a random site
and i yearn for a cutesy little skype conversation
with a complete stranger
and i yearn for people to ask me to go places
instead of me asking them
and i yearn for them to remember me,
and i yearn for them to remember my name
and that it's leeza, not lyza
and that i have feelings, too
and i hate this back brace
and that i just want to laugh with them
and i don't want them to laugh at me
and i just worry so much
and i am jealous because they are concerned with
grades and boys, grades and girls
and i just try to fit in
because i am jealous.
welp this is personal
basically i have really bad scoliosis and my surgery date is confirmed
wow am i fine or panicked? at the moment i'm fine, but i know that every single day that goes by is just one day closer to my meltdown.