You distracted me...
You abused me...
You tortured me...
You insulted me...
You frustrated me...
You trapped me...
You killed me...

You turned me down...

I am going down...

And i am dragging you along with me...

That feels good!

You are like a falling star.
Flashing so beautiful to only disappear.
You are like a scent of a rose fading away caught by the wind.
Cut off hurriedly like apple-rind.

Forgotten and lost you will remain.
In the deep ocean you hide and dissolve your pain.
Nobody is pulling you out of the abyss.
Every attempt to help you has gone amiss.

There in the eternal darkness you shall dwell.
The cuts have made your heart swell.
The light in your eyes is fading away.
Forever lost you will remain on your way.

One rock falls
Another one falls...
Two more fall...

And you little rock...
You will linger here for good...

''I forgot you.
I even forgot your name.
In fact i didn't even know you.
I didn't remember seeing you before.''

You handed me the letter without even looking at me...
I knew... I felt it...
This is goodbye...
You were leaving for good...

So i tried to move on without your happy apple pies every morning.
Without the strong scent of your silky hair on my pillows.

But you came back.
After all i had been through all by myself....you came back.
It was a mistake, you said.

But it was too late.
Too late, dear...
I could not speak anymore.
I could not see you anymore.

There you were...standing in front of a cold gravestone....all by yourself...
Crying... for it was too late...
Too late, dear...

Even if i wanted i couldn't say yes...
I could not speak anymore...
I just could not...
It was too late...
If only you had came back a bit earlier...
If only you had realized how wrong you had been...
I could not speak anymore...

There you lingered for hours...
Before the cold silent gravestone...
That whispered quietly...

''I forgot you.
I even forgot your name.
In fact i didn't even know you.
I didn't remember seeing you before.''

Cigarette will not be killing me.
Nor will beer.
Nor will drugs.
Nor will diseases.
Nor will guns.
Nor will war.
Nor will men.
Nor will evils.
Nor will God.



You **WILL!

Swiftly he moves and disappears into the darkness.
His ****** hands are cold and his mind is restless.
He just took his lover's life as a sign...
Wrung her through fear and pain....

No angel is redeeming her tortured soul.
In her soul remains a dark vicious hole.

''Loreena, my love...
I have loved you so much that it hurts.
If i had not had your love then there would have been no truth.
My feeling would have turned into thin air.
Your life would not have been spared.

Now he has set her free...
From all the pain she was about to see...
Night has grown darker as he walks towards the river
He throws her body slowly into the water

Iy mann mahnd dá laht...
Naht finnúnd ay dá biáhn...


Lost forever, he will never find peace.
Little horn, thorn in the flesh, the unclean.
The Eye that watches the world, The Veiled One.
Hiélo naht urñd da biánh...

Black gaping hole in souls to find.
Such a redeem in restless minds.
Reflected deep down inside.
Shamé'nuun íy thû nam baidh...

Dá Lãht....
Curses for blessings...

Dá Biáhn...
The unheard voices...

Dranna ahr finnúnd bhar tut....*

Why did you betray The Son of Man with a kiss...... Judas???

You saw a woman showing her affection to her man.
I saw a woman conquering her man.
You saw a man with a huge smile on his face.
I saw a man with a fake smile thinking hard trying to figure out what to do.
You saw them perfectly in love.
I saw them perfectly in pretending.

My love....
We were standing in front of a mirror...
Looking at our own reflections...

It was raining.
I was running.
Seeking for you alone.
Wandering around.

Then i saw you there.
Emitting your beauty to share.
Standing in the rain.
I reached out to hold you with pain.

And the fog rolled down and covered you, out of my sight.
I closed my eyes so tight.

When i opened my eyes,
You had turned into air.

It was cold today and i hastened home like i never had before.
There under my christmas tree i saw your present for me, wrapped up in a beautiful blue box.

This is it, i thought.
I could not wait.
I opened it very slowly enjoying every moment like rain on my skin on a summer day.

And there it was...
The most beautiful present i had ever seen in my life...

Your already-signed Divorce Papers...


My love, it is gonna be the merriest christmas for us to remember...
Now i can have you completely...

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to me...

I am looking into the mirror...
And see my reflection to my horror...
No... It's not me...
it's someone else's reflection i see...
I punch it hardly and and watch the mirror breaking into little pieces...
Feels good... Almost like hapiness...

Once there was an old woman who collected hundreds of dolls.
She had no family no kids.
She only lived with her dolls.
Whom she described as her children.
She would not let anyone touch them.
Or even take a look closer at them.

They need to rest, she always said.
They go out to play every night and always return home before dawn.
That is why they need to rest all day long. They need their strengths for the nights.

She even sang to them. Tucked them in every morning in their boxes.

Go to sleep, my sweet ones.
Deep in your slumber i want.
Night has grown darker.
Yet my love for you is even sweeter.

Sometimes she talked to them like talking to living kids.
She combed their hair.
She polished their porcelain skins.

When the old woman died, her neighbours buried her right beside her house, under a walnut tree.

Ever since then the neighbours have started hearing a choir of crying sad voices every night.

*Go to sleep, my sweet ones.
Deep in your slumber i want.
Night has grown darker.
Yet my love for you is even sweeter.

I took a sip of coffee and thought of you.
You had hurt me worse than anybody could ever do.
I thought it was me.
I thought you could see.

I thought i could trust you.
But you gave me all the reasons not to.
I knew it was only a game to you.
Nothing you felt toward me was true.

I am so terribly sorry.
But if i can not have you, neither can he.
I have to destroy him.
That man...you call husband...

I won't be the other man anymore...

Paul Johnson was a mad psychopath.
He had killed hundreds of women in his life all by himself.
He never used any tools to ****. He barehandedly killed those women.

His ex-girlfriend was the reason why he killed.
She had ran away with his brother leaving him hurt so bad like crazy.
His ex-girlfriend was a beautiful blonde.

He chased them for years.
When he found them he brutally killed them.
He mutilated the poor girl into little slices.
He beheaded and castrated his brother.
Then he cast their remains into fire.
Ever since then he had never stopped killing.

His victims were always women aged between 25 and 30.
They're always blonde and blue-eyed.
He strangled them all with his hands before he buried them in his basement.

One day he mistakenly killed a brunette who was wearing a blonde wig and .
He was so startled that he stopped killing and soon after hanged himself

His mother was a beautiful brunette.

Erzsébet Crow is so happy. Her date is going to pick her up at 7. They're going to have a romantic dinner together.
She's been walking around in the living room for 30 minutes.
''Maybe he's not coming. Maybe he's changed his mind'' says she.
''No, sweetheart. He will come'' says her mother.
''i think you should go out with Ted. His father has killed more than three hundred people'' says her father while focusing on his reading.
Erzsébeth pouts at him.
''Dad! Ted is a *****. He wouldn't even **** a dog''.
Mrs.Crow smiles at her daughter.
''Erz tell us about this boy you're going out for a **** with'' asks she.
Erz shyly smiles back at her mother.
''Okay. Do not tell anyone. His name is Zoe. And he killed Mr.President last night. He slipped a grenade in his car when nobody was looking''.
''He did??????'' screams Mrs.Crow.
Erz nods happily. But her father doesn't seem impressed.
''Oh Dad, what???'' asks she.
Mr.Crow glances at Erz curiously.
''Erz honey,i was the one who's supposed to **** Mr.President.''
Erz pouts at him again.
''Dad please be happy for me for once in your life. I've found a really great killer boy who would mutilate a thousand bodies for me''.
Mr.Crows frowns at his upset daughter.
''Erzie, i'd be happy for you if---For God's sake!!!!!!!!'' Lucifer, Erz's pittbull suddenly jumps into his lap. To his surprise the dog got a rotten juicy severed hand in his mouth.
''Oh poor Mrs.Henderson'' exclaims Mr.Crow.
''Mrs.Henderson???? My english teacher????'' shouts Erz.
''Why did you **** her????'' asks Erz, surprised.
''She drove me mad with her questions about the blood stain she found on your shoes'' says Mr.Crow.
''Henry!!!!! How could you!!??? You killed our daughter's favorite teacher'' thunders Mrs.Crow.
Mr.Crows shakes his head ''Hey at least i didn't **** your headmaster. He's such a pain in the ****. If i had you would have had to skip your classes till they found a new one for the position''.
''where did you bury her??'' Mrs.Crow asks her husband.
''The garage''.
''Oh God! Not the garage. Our smarty pants neighbour Mrs.Clayton will smell the stench and finds out and then i will have to **** her before that poor old woman runs to the police'' shouts Mrs.Crow.
''Oh Elizabeth you're just exaggeratting'' protests Mr.Crow.
Suddenly there's a knock on the door.
''Oh it must be Zoe!'' says Erz.
Mrs.Crow looks so happy. She holds her daughter tight.
''Here'' says she, handing Erz a knife ''if he tries to do anything you don't like, just stab him in the heart with this''.
Erz rolls her eyes ''Mom, i can take care of myself. I can rip his ***** out with my own hands''. Mrs.Crows giggles as she opens the door for Zoe.
''Hi Mr and Mrs.Crow!'' greets the boy politely.
''Hi! Okay have fun you guys. Remember, do not **** in exposed places. Hide the body well and leave no blood trails'' warns Mrs.Crow.
Mr.Crow forces himself to give a brief smile before he says ''Okay, Zoey. I want you to bring my daughter home in one piece. If you try to do anything i do not like to her, i'll rip your heart out and eat it, and then i pull your ***** off and give them to my dog'' Lucifer barks his yes.
Mr and Mr.Crow watch their daughter walk away with her first date. They know their little girl has now turned into a big psychopath girl.

You woke up this morning and saw your little ones sleeping so peacefully.
You watched them breathing and you felt complete.
It is just another simple thing you have in your life.
Still it makes you feel amazed each time
You have plenty of these simple things that make you say your grace no matter what.
Sometimes life is that simple.
All you have to do is love and feel.

It was raining hard and cold.
As i walked myself home away from the mad thunderbolts.
Shivering and starving, i felt it all.
Under clouds of storm that rolled.

Then i felt it very clearly.
Somebody was watching me intensely.
I turned around and saw a dark sillhouette of a man in the thick fog.
Walking towards me, alert like a dog.

Feeling cold on my back i kept walking, faster and frightened.
There was something eerie about him that forced me to hasten.
Like a dark shadow in the fog he kept following me silently.

I turned around once again and the man stopped moving.
He stared back at me, the wind kept howling.
And very slowly, as i watched him there, he was fading away, under the street lights.
He was turning into thin air as the fog covered him out of my sight.

He was gone completely...

I did not see it.
A car travelling at very high speed hit me hard.
I fell on the road and then i saw nothing.
It was all dark.

When i opened my eyes everything had changed around me.
Everything was blur and vague to see.
I saw differently.
I smelt differently.
I heard differently.
I felt differently.

And i saw a man walking by hurriedly.
I started to walk, following him silently.

I lit my cigarette and sipped my beer.
I had nothing to fear.
I had nothing in my way.
I was not a stray.

Until you came around.
So terribly you came back to haunt.
With your black lipstick of seduction.
And your deadly spines of attraction.

Now i am only a walking set of bones covered with thin skin.
Through my skin they can see my swollen veins.
I am bleeding inside...
My wounds are opened wide...

I have come to see you.
But you remain silence.
I reach out to you.
And you walk away from me.

For you i have been through wounds and blood.
I ripped my heart out for you.
And crushed it into little pieces.
I wanted to show you how it hurt me to love you that much.

You turn to me.
For the very first time since you went away, you look into my eyes.
''I do not know you'' you say.

I nod my head.
I smile though it hurts to.

As i get home i walk down the hall to my room.

I can still smell your scent in here.
I can still feel your vague presence.
I can still see us making love so passionately in this bed.

Then i turn to the mirror.
I take a deep look into my soul.

My skin is getting paler.
My dark hair is getting lighter.

I raise my hands up in the air and my fingers have vanished.
I can not feel my heartbeat anymore.
I can not feel my blood running through my veins anymore.

I raise my head.
My eyes have gone.
Leaving two dark gaping holes.

My face is fading away.
I can see my own skull grinning at me.
As my skin crumbles.

Very slowly...
Very slowly i am turning into air...
You will never hear anything from me anymore.

The room is now completely empty.

Christmas Eve

I take a look at my watch...
It is Dec 24 1975....

I am walking myself into the forest.
Feeling strange like i will never rest.
Those trees looking back at me with caution.
Mistically i am drowning in a dark vision.

I see colours of white, blue, and green swirling swiftly before me.
Lines of horizon running freely as cosmical as they be.
Faces i have and have not seen whispering among the trees that are humming.
As i float i turn myself to the sky, yearning.

Then all of a sudden i find myself lying on the snow.
Still and hollow.
Gloomy shadows of the trees dancing vaguely on me.
Such a magic to see.

I take a look at my watch...
It is Dec 24, 1986...

I see you there.
Having some drink with her.
Looking so happy and all out.
With the music thundering out loud.

She takes your hand and puts it on her.
As she looks deep into your eyes.
Such a longing and hopeful gaze.
But my heart runs cold as ice.

Then she kisses you.
Like the last drop of autumn dew.
You put your hand on her thigh.
Lingers there for a while.

I sip my last drop of wine.
Feel it seeping through this heart of mine.
People dancing on the dance floor distracting me.
But you're the only one i have come to see.

She kisses you again more.
And you touch her passionately as she jerks off like an innocent *****.
I touch my self dancing the night away.
Touch me touch her i want to say.

Touch her like you touch me
Let her in like you embrace me.
Tonight my blood would dry very soon.
With the rhythm of your passion.

Touch her like you touch me...
Touch her...
Touch her...
I want you to touch her...

Heaps of dead leaves scattered by the wind
Your hand once beautiful, now stuck out dead
Barren you, autumn tragedy, and me unkind
There was neither hopes nor thread

You, my last and most beautiful
Prayers coming out, flat and pitiful
Only from me and the air hanging heavy
As much cold as your skin so deathly

To be forgotten and lost
Though once loved and wanted the most
My heart hurt you could not see
Confused yet satisfied as i be

Now evoking and provoking spirits
Tales and nothing hints
Your hand in my forever dreams
Twenty...forty...or till i die in my sleep

When a man loves a man...
He will destroy everything around.
Nothing is left safe and sound.

Because that man he loves is himself.

Your father hates my accent.
I think he's only trying my patience.
Your mother hates my tattoes.
But she's just like your father too.

Your brother and sisters are turning me down.
Your friends don't know for you miles i will run.
They can not feel this kiss, this touch.
Empty spaces i have been through to show you i love you so much.

I killed someone but you have killed me.
You're turning me into a different person.
You see the man in me.
We're sailing towards a new horizon.

Rest your heart on mine.
I am not making love to your father.
I am not kissing your mother.
I am not touching your brothers and sisters.

I am the prince of darkness...
I am a criminal...
I am a murderer...
Whatever i am before them...

I cast your sadness into shadow...
I **** your pain and sorrow...

Náaht tu finnúnf aro'd.....

Why
did you
tell me you
love me while
pointing your gun
at me unmercifully

Please help me....
It is cold out here...
It is getting darker...
Please share me some of your light...
I only see darkness of night...
I want some of your warmth...
I have cold dew seep into me...
I am feeling so lonely...
I need some company...
I can not be alone...
I do not want to live on my own...
Please...
Help me...


They killed me weeks ago...
They buried me somewhere in the forest...
Can you not hear me cry out loud...
The earth has been digesting my body...
My hair is falling off...


Help me...
Can you not see me....
Can you not hear me...
Please...
It is cold out here...
I can not be alone...
I have been watching you for hours...
I am standing right outside your window now...


Let me in...
Let me in...
Let me in...
Help me...
*

Hartûk ba dáht annd tieró una bhadäl...
Hartûk ba dáht annd tieró una bhadäl...
Hartûk ba dáht annd tieró una bhadäl...
Meltúnna....

I am like a leaky roof.
I let tears pass through me wherever i go.
My sorrow has not yet come to pass.
I am still the same person as i was many years ago.

You mutilated my body and you called it love.
You ripped my heart out and put it on a burning stove.
And then you ate it.....slowly...
Excitedly... Unmercifully...

You're in my head.
Your song you thread.
Such a glorious threat.
Hardly catch my breath.

You're in my head.
Crying, my eyes are red.
Empty and hollow like dead.
You know i have bled.

You're in my head.
Squeezing and touching like in my bed.
My Love your empty heart sheds.
To bottomless pit i am led.

*You're in my head...
Always are...