I'll be able to go back
To that beach
To that moment
Where life had meaning
My future had a value
Someday..
I'll feel the waves caress my skin
I'll taste the breeze
Chase shadow of every seagull
Witness that sunset in her eyes
someday huh
Every dreamer has to dream
Someday
I'll know why she called herself a mother
I'll know why she couldn't say no
Hopefully my hatred will die with her
All I know is I miss the things so far out of reach
I linger on those that bother me
Watch as everything crawls under my skin
I want to go back to that beach
Scratch my head
Ponder on everything familiar
Wonder about everything I'll learn

Before me they all lay
Calling me to jump in between the lines
These pages call for me to **** them with emotions
Forbidden by my heart to express
Empty pages beckon to be filled
With the love I show her
Only when her parents aren't around

You died even before the words
Reached the tip of my tongue
And now you're gone
I can't hold you at night
I can't whisper poetic words
In your ears as we lay together
I can't kiss you
Your lips cold and discolored
I can't touch you
Your body boney and fragile
I never got the chance to say goodbye
Because you ruined us as a couple
Left before I could comprehend
What was happening before me
What was unfolding
There would no longer be an us
You acted on impulse
You thought he loved you
You crawled back to me
I just turned my back
Because you hurt me
In a way no one has before
I never got the chance to say goodbye
So I'm taking this opportunity to say it now
Goodbye

See the peasants
As they weep at my feet
See the hearts
You led me to break
They all bow before me
Everything is dark and still
Tears fall even faster
Fears grow heavier
You see my love
I am no longer the man you fell for
But the demon you created
When you decided to curse my name
And walk out of my life
Leaving my very heart
Breaking and dragging behind you

On your mark
Get set
Go!
One foot in front of the other
How many years could I stay in front
How long could I stay first
In this foot race with death
Chasing breathes
Wanting to slow down
But either way
It seemed death stayed ahead
Got a tattoo to remind myself
Death will always win
I'm just taking detours
Visiting villages of my memories
I'm racing through my own life
And these seven seconds
Brought more joy then all my life held
Through all the sorrow
I still saw smiling faces calling me
Into an oblivion
Waiting to face my guilt and shame

I'm counting the text and calls
Hearing voicemails while I'm at work
Checking facebook and instagram
Photos of the good days
When worry was a sack of ****
And a bottle of *****
Easily taking care of me
Video games for hours
Time just passing you by
Forgetting what day it was
Or if you missed another year
But I didn't care to hear it from them
I was waiting for you to text me
For you to call
Maybe hearing your voice would make today
Less of another day
And one worth living
20 years old as of today
And valentines day is around the corner
Maybe forgetting me now
Is a better way of saying
I'll be even more lonely four days from now

Not a single thing
I dont know
Who I am
What I have become
What this thirst is for
Why I have a hunger for death
Maybe its an interest of mine
Something I shall study
But I dont know
I dont know a **** thing
Im lost at sea
Compass broken
No direction to go
Just floating here
Not knowing anything
I dont remember my name
I dont recognize the face in the mirror
Everything has changed so quick
Even my broken heart
Has become something of interest
To people who have never felt its pain
Even my eyes have changed
Into a sight that woman have melted from
I dont know
I just dont know anymore

So will anybody try to explain this **** to me?

Take my life
Fall from the heavens
End this pain
Twinkle twinkle little star
I wished upon you
For this life to end
But you saw the pain
Gave me moonlight
Brighter than shining gold
More precious than oceans of silver
I wished upon a star
Your star
And you gave me a better life
Even though the pain is there
I still have her to love
And I thank you
You granted me a wish
I didn't wish

I love you
I love her
She loves him
You're with him
How do I go from point A
To point B
If every bridge is burnt
I'm so ******* confused
There are no answers to my questions
Might as well stop asking the oldest
What do I do?

I'm fighting tears
My older brother
Laying in a hospital bed
Infection on a heart valve
Doctors saying I dont care
He's states away
*** am I supposed to
Make a 25 year old man
Take his medicine
When he's too busy getting high
Trying to survive this world
***** of a mother
More friend and foe
Bundled into a sunk in face
And fat rolls buckling knees
You're ******* kidding me
If you think I'll let him die
I'll pay his way out here
Have him move in with me
Straighten out his life
Because I'd rather get buried first
It could happen
I could lose my brother
The guy that tried to **** me
When I was only two
The guy I dropped on his head
Because he decided to steal from me
Sure he's not the perfect person
Or the ideal roommate
But he's still my family
And I'll be ******
If I let him die
When the rest dont care about him
Sure he's a drug addict
Like that ***** that gave birth to us
So what that he has a tendency
To be a complete *******
But I'll try my damnest
To see that he lives longer than me
It could happen
And I'm too far to do a **** thing
If it happens
Two bodies will be buried
That woman who says she's a mother
And my brother

It's on a level
Not easily comprehended
Perhaps it's the conflict between my heart and mind
Each wanting something
My body cannot handle
The reason to my affliction
There really is no definitive answer
Its just something I struggle with
Something I am forced to deal with
And unfortunately it might **** me
If I cannot resolve it soon

The repair of my mind
is not as easy as it once was.
I am broken. Longing to be fixed. Longing to be able to heal myself. Working slowly day by day to heal another piece that has grown
gray with lack of light.
Fading to black I fear
Duct tape and super glue
Only holds the fragments
Of this mirror mind
Reflecting constant strain
Emotions
Pulled tugged stressed
Mentally damaged
Spider webbing to my heart
I can't take much more
I need an escape
A back door to these fractures
I endure falling
Trying to capture
Juggling before they shatter further
Gashes open up
My insides are slowly showing
Mental becomes physical
Only so much I can hide
Spotlighted to those who know me best
Foreshadowed to others who don't
This picture show of horror
Generating more fears
How do I ask for help
When it's becoming too much for me
Alone I thought I could handle this
Face my demons
I now know
I need a bigger monster
To keep me from being consumed
And if I'm still to fall
I won't have done it alone
I'll call it a victory
If someone could love me
In those final seconds

Silent whispers
Tortured screams
An existence far off into the unknown
Pictures played silhouette motions
3D pixelations of distorted memories
Taunting my eyes to rain
Haunting the child still in me
Petrified of putrid symphonies
Harmonized by the laughing decedance
Decaying ever so rapidly
Within these dreams

I saved a "life" today
I didn't run it front of a bus
I didn't take a shot to the heart
I didn't catch a speeding bullet
I simply broke the mirror
Saved my reflections life
From looking into my death gripped eyes
After all who will I talk to
When I'm all alone
I'm almost a hero...
                               ...right?

I don't know what to do
What to write
My mind is just a blur
Fog has rolled in
Stripping my vision
Leaving only silhouettes
Of ideas based on guesses
This fog needs to be lifted
To let the world see
My decayed and rotting flesh
Covering bones so fragile
For without a heart
I am no more alive
Than the corpses
Within 16th century graves

When you find love
What do you do with it?
When you find someone to love
How tight do you hold them?
When you find happiness
How do you know that's what it is?
When will I get the chance to at least try
To make you happy?
Because I know I love you
Unfortunately I cant hold you
But I promise one day soon
I will hold you
Love you the way you deserve
I hope your reading this
I hope you know you are the only one
That I want to hold my heart
I am yours
I hope you are all mine

Still lost to this darkness
Prisoner of the madness
Yet I proudly say
I'm back

Today marks my decent
Back into the life of poetry
I so desperately need
Again I say Hello to you all

All those subtle acts
Random as they might be
Carefully thought out
Remember DO's and DONT's
All the while portraying
With rainbow flags
Neon strobes
Megaphone so loud
You don't hear it
You literally see it
The feelings I have for you
Unreciprocated
Never demanded payback
Even when I tell myself
Just forget it all
Everything that has YOU
Graffiti carved into it
You manage to stay
Like an obedient dog
To a foreign owner
My commands and desires
Have no interest in listening
I watch you smile
Hold back tears
Deny depression
Hope and pray
For the exact outcome
I treasure in dreams
Only difference is
I'm not in yours
Notoriously I'll settle
Eventually in that specific
Happy little home
You made for me
In your life
As a dear friend
With all intentions
Of placing me on a shelf
Forgetting I exists
Similar to children's dolls
If I were to become inanimate
I'd surely collect dust
All effort to keep me
In the forefront of temporal lobes
You wouldn't even use
If I didn't chisel a smile
On your statue expression
Keen on not letting the world see
That very human little girl
Who only wants what she wants
Love and affection
Attention and devotion
Not placed on a pedestal
Merely elegantly placed
To surely be noticed first
If only you knew
What I keep hidden from you
Maybe you do
Then I'm just a fool
Either way it goes it seems
I don't have stupid
On my forehead
But undoubtedly it's stamped
Ever so boldy
Across my ***
*****
For patiently waiting
In a line to a buffet
Closed down for so long
Dying of starvation
Knowing no other place
Will be as enjoyable
As the one I dined at
That one time
So long ago
If you knew
If you really knew
That I don't just love you
My heart idolizes you
You captivated me
Far beyond comprehension
That it irates me
I can't figure out
Exactly why I'm stuck
Feeling this way
You're my sun
Keeping my earth in orbit
Till your light switch
Starts being played with
Disconnecting me from you
Leaving me awaiting
A black hole
You pull me away from
Just as I'm about to dive in
If I could erase you
From my heart I would
Just so you could chase
All the happiness
You may or may not find
While I chased nothing
Expecting nothing to come
From every little bit of something
Knowing, if you knew
How I really felt
You'd be lost right with me
Sipping depression
On anxiety front property
Stranded on an overpopulated island
To loneliness instead
Where unmet hopes
Grow like weeds
Often used as kindling
For a fire to get through the day
So tell me now
Do you really want to know me
Black box warning label
How I feel comes as a side effect
I guarantee you don't
I'd advise not
Then you'll have to face
How you really feel
Trying to juggle
What you want
With what you need
And what you have
So whatever you do
I ask at least
Turn the magnet off
That way rust can finally
Consume my iron heart
Unbending in it's unwavering decision
To love you and only you
With little to no interest
In potential relationships
Or ****** fulfilment
All I need is your smile
And I have everything
So if you didn't
Maybe you do now
Maybe you won't ever
Depending on if I ever
Convince myself to try
Attempting for you to know
So I'll know
What I need to know
To just close this chapter
I've been rereading
Since the day I met you

Thought I'd never hear it
Much alone read it
Missed
It's a feeling I get when I look in a mirror
I missed you
My other half
A reflection only subtly different
Then what I know to be me
But neither of us can do it
Both afraid
To just say hey
Maybe love wasn't the season
But a friendship
Was the ship we were to sail
Yet we rotted every board
Before we built our own Black Pearl

Keeping me awake at night
Tossing, turning, gears churning
Funerals filled with tears
Swimming pools of sorrow
Caskets carried away in the current
What would happen when I'm gone
Who will my kids become
Who will she marry after I'm gone
Does this life really end
Do I time travel every time I close my eyes
Will I open them come first light
Or will that dark void finally devour my soul
Did I ever exist when tomorrow comes
Guess thats my question
Is it the seconds before me I fear
Or the moments that I'll never enjoy
Scare me the most
Everything fades but why does it hurt so bad

Yes
No
Maybe
Would it be so
Could it be
Do bees sing
Elegant songs of sorrow
Perhaps motivation
Wrong
Right
****** would be poetry
Life wouldn't be death
All signs would point to somewhere
But nowhere at the same time
I'm making sense
Its your own sense
Nonsense
Be it may
A merry go round
Where one thing is two
But none in its own sense
Its rudimentary
But still elementary
Get it?

I watched as roads slick
With the tears of angels
Catch fire to loved ones
Twisted metal and hollow eyes
Screams of drunken lips
Helpless to the chaos before them
I'll sip on my coke
My monster energy
Watch you all laugh and play
Drink to your hearts content
Shout with tears of the troubles you seen
Then stutter I love you's and I'm sorry's
Wasted before me
A helpless child caught in a torrent
Beer in each hand
Alcohol brewing in your torso
I'm that guy in the back
Hitting on all theses drunkards wives
Even the single ladies I find attractive
Only teasing to keep myself occupied
Afraid of what horrors may come
Driving off into the rain
A shadow looms
Your fate a sealed envelope
A written book before its published
A prelude to another tragedy
My friend I'm the designated driver
Come sit in my '91 Chevy S10
Leave your keys behind the counter
I'll take you where you need to go
If you prefer I'll drive your vehicle
Give me a ride back in the morning
I'll stay the night if I have to
Let me take you in my arms
Shake your hand and tell you your safe
I never again want to see the bodies
Holding tightly to a bumper
Wrapped around light poles
Strippers for deaths entertainment
Scattered remnants on a three year old child
I'll fight the temptation
Free beers and all the shots I can have
Just to see a stranger safe at home

Step up to this mic
Clear my throat
I'll start this off
A glare into souls
That will learn this lesson
Maybe before me
Or a lot harder then I did
I'm sorry
Not the average everyday apology
Truly, Honestly, Sincerely
I'm sorry Mom
For not listening to you
When you begged me to stay young
Keep my innocence about me
Hidden from the reality
It's no prison
It's a violent sanctuary
Love is given never seen
Stupid syllables of anger
Annoyed by not knowing
How to explain who I am
I'm sorry
No heap of *******, get me out of trouble sorry
Truly, Honest;y, Sincerely
I'm sorry Dad
For being a burden
Asking for the world
Not knowing the cost
Hating you when you left
Gone off to work
Too tired to play
Stealing your liquor
Just in the hope to be half the man I saw you as
I'm sorry
No board game in the middle of a hurricane
Just to pass the time
Truly, Honestly, Sincerely
I'm sorry all my ex's
For cheating, for stealing your time
Your love, Your hate, Your perfection
For giving you reasons to do the same
Fighting with poetry
Hoping metaphors healed faster
Then blades dug
I'm sorry
Truly, Honestly, Sincerely
I apologize
I don't need forgiveness
Don't mistake this as a plee
I wish only you know
I apologize for my mistakes
For my short comings
For over doing it
For being an ***
Making one of myself
And forcing you to watch
I regret most
Care for less
Respect you all
Because it shaped the man I will be
Thank you

When I say I have the potential for something
And you decide to question it
It makes me very anger
And like the Hulk
You won't like me when I'm angry
I have the shortest fuse
I'm a hair trigger 45 to your temple
That can send you to your oblivion
Or send you to the depths of a never ending pool of misery
To drown in your hopeless endeavors
In trying to reach the top
Everything is fair game
From this point on
And if I have to slit some throat
Let the puddles of blood grow to lakes then oceans
I'll grab my pen now
Start slashing at the nuisance vine you have become

I am allowing you to tell me what i should write about
It can be a life story
A love story
Your choice
However
There is a catch...
You must message me with #mychoice No. 1527B
The 1st, 5th, 10th, 15th, 20th senders will be chosen
You can send a message 1x per day
These people will be named and recieve a reply
We will discuss your choice of poem
You may help with the writing if you choose so
If you desire to help
Poem must be published on your site as well as mine
Hope to work with many more people
Looking forward to this experience
                                                             -Robert x_x

To be a side thought
All this time driving myself insane
Poem after poem
Conversations worth a ****
Drawings to think you loved me
Like always its all a joke
I had a feeling it was coming
A hole once covered
Reopened in a matter of seconds
I should have took you up
On the offer of forgetting you
But I love when I'm right
When all my fears come true
All of this and for what??
You to never talk to me
Me always starting the conversations
Hey **** it
I wont lose any sleep
All of this was just a wake up call
That love is pointless
Just a waste of time
Hours spent trying to talk to you
Waiting for a reply
Oh well another got away
Can't **** what's already dead
Guess we died without a word
Who's fault was it?
Dont matter
What's the point
All of it was just *******
I fed myself thinking love was possible in my life

When I wasn’t scared
Unafraid of what tomorrow held
When I didn’t care
Who cried who I left behind
Should have done it sooner
While I was young
When I was good enough for it
When nobody mattered
So many ways
I should have done it
Just walked away
Stepped of the deep end
Forgot the world above
Slept in chaos and hatred
Now the only thing I look forward to
Is the day she grows up
And tells me she loves me
For never following through with it

The endless sky seems so dead
A fortress abandoned by wondering eyes
Haunted by the cataclysmic fears
Of asteroids and meteors
Supernovas too close to home
Black holes slowly eating away at the heavens
It all seems so endless
The possibilities of reaching extraterrestrials
Learning what the face of neptune really looks like
Even something so endless doesn't have many secrets
The sky is the sky
The stars are stars
The moon and sun dance together in eternal rotation
Maybe one day I'll get to see
Just what it is out there for me
Why I'm able to survive an endless life of despair
When all it would have taken
Was the 3.2 seconds it took to destroy a car

They dont tell me anything
I can't say sorry enough either
Sorry that I let you into my head
I let you change who I was
Thinking I could be a better man for you
Here I am states away trying to figure out
What I'll do for the next few years
Without you in my arms
Will it always be questions
Scaring the **** out of me
Knowing at any second I could lose you
I'm scared to even tell you I love you
I can't prove it
I can't express it
I'm sorry you fell for me
Hopefully we can work this out

Dear diary...
Scratch that.
I'm a grown man
Lived by the cross
Saw only sins
On this hooded streets
Bat caves of corpses
Under every bridge
Leading out of this joint
How do you get out
When your a prisoner
Serving 50 years on the streets
You become institutionalized
Watching young bloods
Becoming trees lush with potential
Get cut down by lumberjack uzis
Lost my wife and son
Drive by in the night sky
Shooting stars piercing her belly
Never even got to see his face
Didn't get the chance
To show him how to be a real man
Ten times better then his pops
Couldnt watch him grow up
How is that fair
Refused to marry again
What's the use
When bloodlines go extinct
Dinosaurs like me
Are a rare breed
Makes you wonder
What an old man rocking in his chair
Did to earn his freedom
I sold lies
Buried secrets in skulls
Then let them sink
So the fish can taste the filth of humanity
My name was Jesus.
No Christ but never was close
Confessed only once
But that was to a bottle
Popped so many pills
Almost saw hell
You learn something along the way
Death ain't the answer
Violence and warfare
Become the only thing we know
I wish I would have stayed in school
Thought I was cool
Smoking herbs and chasing tail
Reality caught up
When my homie took sail
Drug deal gone wrong
Still pour a shot for him
Everytime I play our favorite song
All I have left is a reflection
Too broken to understand
Why the good lord hasn't taken me

Beads of sweat rolling down his back
Her fingernails digging ditches
Run offs for it all to escape
Lungs gasping for air
As he reaches further down her throat
Loaded cannon he aims and fires
She swallows with a grin
They watch from windows
Getting off as they work up more sweat
More moans to fill their desires
**** through a window seal
Ducking and covering with every position swap
Her on her hands and knees
Begging to be ravished from behind
She cries out for it to go deeper
His hand around his ****
Knowing any minute he'll ***
Him slapping her ***
The thrill of the hunt
Chasing her ******
Through every hole she possesses
Making her look like the filth
These peeping toms enjoy

A whole is ripped in the sky
The earth begins to tremble
Silence is heard all around
Nothing moves
My own heartbeat echoes
For miles and miles
People dressed in white linen
Garments that of the greeks
Walk forward into view
On the edge of the whole
I feel something scratch at my feet
I look down and see
Corpses ****** and partially dismantled
A screech comes from them
But thier mouths never open
I look around
To see if thier is anyone else
But only a dark figure
No shape
Just there
Thin but noticeable
Then within a heartbeat
The world goes black
I feel like Im falling
I awake to a bed
Covers thrown every which way
Drenched in sweat
Breathing so heavy
Heart racing
Hoping the last words
I heard before I awoke
Were never going to come true
But I know
Part of it has come true
Because I have murdered
The hearts of those
Willing to love me
When loving me
Is **** near impoosible

On what I should do
How to prepare
The excitement
The fear
The thoughts running a muck
Am I ready
Will I be great
Maybe good
Or like my father
Chasing his dreams
Going farther away from home
Will I see him or her grow
Will I watch as he or she
Surpasses the legacy I left myself
Will I be able to teach them
All of life’s lessons
Or the important ones
Before my coffin is hammered shut
Thoughts thoughts
And your almost here little one
Can I build you a home
Before I hold your hand
Will I have been good enough
Of a father, friend, or fortress
To ensure you are ready
For the life we gave you
To survive the world we were given

You exist in this life with the heavenly wow factor

I painted the walls
The sky
The tiles on the floor
A sick, twisted blood red
As you walked out the door

Am I to blame
For what you have done to me
So I guess Ill now go to bed
But did you have to say I was nothing to you?
Thats why I painted everything red

I painted a masterpiece
Want to know how its so pretty?
Because I painted it with you
You ****** me off so I drained you dry
Now I have nothing else to do

Lifeless
Emotional
Nothing seems real
Artificial
Every word forced into existence
This dictionary holds open
Written in invisible ink
Maybe I am the worst
A worthless writer
A has-been
Perhaps I'm no longer real
No longer really alive
Just suffering the loss of my mind
Trapped in rewind
Watching my life happen all over again
I'm a *******
Thinking my life had a purpose
Maybe my purpose was only to fail
Be a laughing stock
A joke for this world

Drugs, lining glass tables
Alcohol, bottles replacing carpets
1996 was the year I overdosed
Born a drug addict
Alcoholic by nature
This is who I am
Whether I like it or not

I was wandering on the beach
Looked up to the sky
A shadow ran across the vivid oil painting
Of the great sunset
I bowed before this sight
Marveled at its glory
I saw god today
The worst part is
It was just a day dream
In the bathroom where I cut myself
And all I saw was the reflection in the mirror

Yeah I am a god
I can take life or give it
I can be a temple for your burdens
I don't ask for money in return
I just ask for you to be there
When you witness  a god break

If you're wondering what the Diary Of Broken Souls is, It's just a bunch of stories put together to try and have somebody know there is other people that go through the same stuff or somewhat similar things. Now not every story ends in suicide, and the reason it ends that way in these stories is to leave the victim wondering what exactly it is they will miss out in life, through all the bad times, the good times, and even holding hands with somebody that understands (even if that hand is an inanimate object). Everything holds value to somebody and you shouldn't let it go. The Diary Of Broken Souls simply put is a fictitious compilation of stories based somewhat on real life people even if I don't know them, I know how they feel somehow. I guess its just talent or maybe a guess but it hits some people dead on the nail. Just know suicide is a last resort for no good reason I know I tried.

You couldn't call me on my ****
Tell me I ****** up
Instead you get ******
So when I thank you
For being the only person
Not to tell me happy birthday
Like I asked
You get even more ******
Well *******
And the horse you rode in on
You wanted to leave
Because one bad joke
Well adios I didn't need you
I'm an *******
Always will be
So thanks for proving me wrong
You're just like the rest of them
Only thing different
Is your sense of humor

Every star a number
Every cliche a vow
Seems I lost count
Of every word I ever said to you
Only three seem to matter to me
Yet my lips hide them from you
As my teeth want to embed them
Into your neck as if to say hi
It all resembles the countless days
I spent loving you
Without realizing I was wishing
On every shooting star
Just to hear you say it once

Its remarkable to see
What you have become
To finally see you smiling
I never thought I would see this happening
I guess I really was bad for you
You found love
Even after I almost killed you
Congratulations my dear
I wish you luck
In all of your future endeavors

Tears of joy

Mid autumn embers

My heart extinguished

By ocean blue eyes

Our sunset love

A beauty to remember

Never dying when we close

The windows to our souls

Forever resting side by side

Eternal lovers in every life to come

Doctor says I'll be fine
Don't know how long I have
Self destructive tendencies
Killing me quicker
Any second I could overdose
Pour one to many shots
A cocktail of chaos
Is this salt or coke
**** it, on the fries they go
I need to sober up
But ****, its a disease
I'm going to die one way or another
Looks like life got worse before better
Guess that's what happens
When the dead try to love the living
When the living forget the dead

Questions no answers
All these things
Beating on my skull
You're the only one that can help
But you hide
So why should I try to continue?

I ****** up pretty much everything in my ******* life

Lost for words yet again
1:24am still awake
Head filled with screams
Laughter following
Hounds on a fox hunt
Looking for a sign
Where the rabbit tracks start
Tumbleweeds rolling
Maybe if I keep listening
I’ll finally hear that poetic voice
The shy one
Only speaking when it’s had enough
When silence becomes its enemy
Provoking embers into flames
I’ll continue to jot down
Asking if it has anything to say
Alcohol anonymous meetings
Share your feelings
The reasons for your actions
Pass when you don’t feel like it
Somethings got to give
Please just say something to me
Anything
Even if it is
Another suicide note
We can’t carry out
Deaths not a fast food restaurant
We simply wait for a table

Smoking on this blunt
Sitting on the edge of the roof
No longer the runt
Drinking and toking like a goof
Guess my rhyming skills are rusty
But just listen to the world
These old work pants dusty
Every mind swirled
Just listen as the smoke fills the air
Man this **** must be laced
Or the alcohol makes me no longer care
I wonder if my fall could be traced
To all these lonely nights
Wondering if you're ok
Just listen to the blue lights
Too late at the end of my day

Whiskey on her lips
A cigarette barely hanging on
To her index and *******
Scared to fall and set her world on fire
She was lovely
Perfectly ravishing as she fought her intoxication
Said her name was Daisy
But couldn't remember where she parked the general lee
Sadness painted her face
Like ***** to her shoes
Turkey sandwich and a light salad
A fifth of crown chased with a few too many shots
Of her good ole friend Jaeger
She was lovely
As she passed out barely missing the steel
Of a rednecks jacked up Chevy bumper
Waking up with mascara running down both cheeks
Clothes hung neatly next to the bed
She asked if I was the butler
I only said I was the one who saved her
From the woman in her mirror
She was lovely
Blood flushing her cheeks
A cuter kiss then what I could give
Alcohol leads to nightmares
Nights we can't seem to remember
I told her she was lovely
Even after she tried to ruin herself
By painting red walls redder
On toilet seats of forgotten stalls
She laughed and called me crazy
Maybe I am
But who cares
When you witness beauty rise from chaos

Just get it over
Be one of many people
Surrender to the simple truth
You ******* hate me
I'll leave you alone
Let you read my ******* work
It isn't any good anyways
I'm a has been
A wanna be
So get it over and ******* hate me