The Queen and Princess Treacle
were sitting in the bath
The Queen let off a raspberry
while Princess Treacle laughed

The Princess dropped a hot one
the bubbles like perfume...
the Queen was quite disgusted
and stormed out of the room...

Treacle was quite perplexed
so laughed a little more
'til Queenie shouted oh so loud;
' You filthy royal ***** '

Treacle released a sinister laugh
a ***** she might be...
Yet Philip didn't seem to mind
removing her dungerees

he done her in the palace gardens
late one summer's night
Treacle was but a young lesbian
but he sorted her out alright

As Treacle's secret garden doors were
opened, under the light of the moon...
Queenie did bellow for her corgis
searching from room to room...

but all she found was Philip
shafting Treacle on the lawn
so they had a royal *******
then watched some German ****

Nobody else will do
For comfort and joy
For tears and travel dreams
For laughter and love
For silence and quiet beyond compare
These are the arms I run to
Those are the arms that empathize and sympathize
In your arms is where I awaken and slumber
As your blue eyes reassure me and only in your arms

I visit the dead at
the grocery store,
library,
on the phone
and
in my e-mails.
I watch them  
on TV,
at the beach,
in my dreams
and in the eyes
of crows.

They wear
colorful clothes, and
always want to
sell me on their
way of life.
No thanks, I’m  
calling the whole  
thing off.
I’m going fishing.