Inside I feel empty, like my heart forgot it’s way home
Inside I feel numb, like my souls forced to always roam
Away from where it should be and frankly it hurts like hell
Because I’m loved by many and needed by more and I know that **** well

Nobody seems to understand what this feels like
Imagine being happy but never being able to see the light
Every day you wish for death and everything causes pain
But who are you to change when everyone stays the same
You miss who you used to be and you miss how it all was
Before your life went down the drain and your brain was replaced by static fuzz
You’re incapable of feeling whole for more than 5minutes or so


So if you’re Able to imagine all that... answer your own question.
Would you be ok?

This honestly isn’t a poem but more of a rant of sorts if that’s what you call it. Don’t let anyone hurt you, it stays with you and I promise that’s true. Walk a day in the shoes of others who have been hurt as I have and just notice all the things that you wouldn’t normally see. The past stays with you. And for those who decide to hurt anyone, *******. You don’t realize how badly you could destroy someone. The smallest actions cause the biggest tidal waves for others. Be aware, and learn to love and not hate.

Am I worth it to you or am I just another girl
Are you lying to me like you lied to her
Are you using me like you used her
Maybe I’ll never know,
But the questions make me hurl...

Months have gone
by and I miss you still
I still look to the sky
And wonder what it’ll take for me to bring you home

I am not your kind. Rather I wasn’t then
I was cold and unfeeling and selfish
I now am a ghost of what I once was
And forever could have been
There are many like me in this world
Many who feel as I do
And who have done as I have done
Love never comes easily for us
Because we can’t let another in.
We are not your kind at all.

When nobody sees my progress where do I go then?
When nobody sees what I go through how do they see where I’ve been
When nobody listens to my voice what do I do in that time
Because all I have left is you.

Loudly I hear you
But yet you do not speak
Boldly I see you
Although you do not move.

Yet I love you
For what I see
And still I cherish you
For what I hear.

meine Liebe
mein Leben
meine ganze Welt,
ich liebe dich.

Amazing things come to those who wait
I believe that we will last through this
Everyday I see more of you and this fate
Was not what we had initially chosen
But nonetheless, we will over come.

Living is making the best of every day as it comes. Accepting the mistakes and doing all that you can to make them right. Living is not painless, but living is all apart of the plan. The plan we have had set for us from the day we were born, our destiny.

The problem with life is that it always takes the most beautiful things and crushes them... crushes them into what would now be barely recognized as anything.

I will start again
Burning the ashes of what’s old
Until I know I’ll be ok
Until my future is paved in gold.

I wish you would go away
I can’t stand the stress you bring
My heart weighs heave with mistakes
And you remind me how it will never be the same

You won’t let me leave
It’s like I’m held by chain
But everyday it’s something new
Another uncomfortable conversation another ****** day

As the air leaves my lungs
Know it was all for you
To live and to love
And to bring the sun like you do
I loved you until the end

I'll never get that time back
And neither will you
But now that I've begun my walk to death
There's nothing we can do

You promised you loved me
But what happened there
You promised to stay with me
But did you ever care

You lie to me without reason
You think that I don't know
That everything you do
Is all one big ******* show.

I wear a necklace now around my neck
That has a part of you inside
I keep this necklace close to me
To remind me of when you were alive.

I miss all the things we would do
I miss you yelling my name
Because now that I know you're gone
Nothing will ever be the same.

In the end there is one thing I know
My feelings for you haven't changed
And I don't think they ever will though
And all the time away from you
You still have my heart to hold
I don't want it back and though times are tough right now, but we'll make it through
My love for you will never change
And that's just what I know.

I've developed a growing hatred
for the person I am inside
And if I could find a way
I'd burn myself alive

I can never look in the mirror
Or smile from the heart
I know one day the way I feel
Will slowly tear me apart

I can't help the way I feel
It's something I've developed over the years
I can't help the girl I see in the mirror
Even when it brings me to tears

I'm always so depressed
And I'll never understand why
I'll never know why I feel this pain
Or why I keep it locked inside

Part of me knows its not my fault
But the others scream in rage
"It's your fault he's gone!"
It keeps my heart locked in a cage.

There are days when I look back at you
and question how long you'll be there
Some days I came to question myself
and if you really care

Sometimes I sit back and ask
if you love me as you say
But it never makes a difference
Because it's my fault I'm this way

It's my fault I second guess
what you tell me is really true
It's my fault I can't accept
What I've done to you

If I were you I would have left
all that time ago
I would have cut me off, deleted my texts
and found a new way to go

I'm sorry for all the things I've done
I didn't want you to hurt.
I'm sorry for the pain I've caused
I'm sorry I treated you like dirt.

I can remember all the small details
About who you are
I remember the day
I ended up in your car

I remember the day
That you skipped away
I remember the day
I said I couldn't stay

I can't say I don't miss you because
That would be a **** lie
The truth is that when I look in your eyes
All I see is what could have been

Goodbye Sunshine I wish you the best
Now close your eyes and get some rest
The silence you hear will carry you away
It saddens me to know you cannot stay

The memories you have will soon fade
And the darkness of night brings a new day
Goodbye, my love. You'll be ok
We'll be together again someday.

For some time now I've felt
That the end was truly near
Not yet at my door
But somehow miles away

It tracks my every move
It won't let me leave its sight
It follows all my trails
Long into the cold night