standing on my balcony
night sky
pitch black
no light to see

i think to myself
the only person i live for
is me

it could work out
life could be better
maybe one day
i'll settle for the good fight

i guess its alright

that the stars aren't out tonight

some nights I wish you'd
just knock — it's not just my door
I'll let you in through

when i think about it now

even having distance

i cant tell you how

it happened

even if you insisted

an accident

driven by emotion

inverted devotion

what a destructive thing

it can be

spilled the glass

but the water

will never go back in again

you see

a tragedy

written by linearity

if i was god

i would play a shell game

with the disparity

of cause and effect

move em around

until its correct

but

we both know

i am just another silly man

who turned up the heat

too much

burned

then broke

your precious love

you never TRULY loved me

oh

how do i know?

because fire is hot

swallowed by the earth

a blank slate at birth

now i am here

i fear

your fleeting love

i love

your fear of losing me

it begins

with you and me

and it ends

with you losing me

eyes wide open

in the pitch black

you see

what i see

made a deal

that truth is what we feel

together

in this mess

we digress

eyes wide shut

what we got

is what we lost

paths got twisted

we missed it

the mystery of being loved

crawling

to the tv
to the sound who shakes
my state of mind

crawling

to the fridge
to the taste who soothes
my state of mind

crawling

to the door
to the person that upsets
my state of mind

crawling

to the window
to the view that bores
my state of mind

crawling

to your secret unseen light
to the shine that uplifts
my state of mind

not

crawling

anymore

on the couch

at heavensgate

heart of cold

live to live, but waiting for the end

sending radio signals of love (no responds)

you are my jupiter, out of reach, protecting me

redacted, distracted

from what came before (haha)

to be alive, its optional

i got picked by...god? to be who i am

i didnt pick it

its a scam