I am learning how to be a person again.

I am learning how to put food in my mouth again and
taste it.
how to eat (3 times) every day and
not to skip meals or
spit them out when I am
upset.

I am learning how to be a person again.

I am learning how to let myself feel again-
the good emotions and
the bad ones.
how to take the memories out from their locked trunk and
examine them,
turn them over and feel the sharpness of every
edge
to not run away
even when they bite.

I am learning how to be a person again.

I am learning how to not tear my skin apart when everything becomes
too
much.
how to not pick at old wounds and
make them new ones.
I am not very good at this one yet
but some lessons take more time to learn.

I am learning how to be a person again.

I am learning how to love again-
real love.
how to trust and
not to shake when your hands come near me
and not to make
excuses
for things that can never be excused
and how to take
the walls
down
slowly.