'Don't chase girls. Chase a career. Chase enough money and girls will come. Don't dwell on heartbreak, work yourself to death and don't get married, the next time I meet you better be at your funeral because you have worked yourself to death'.

One and half year later
'This is my girlfriend. We're getting engaged. Yeah chase love. It's beautiful'.

I avert his gaze
his hand sliding up my thighs
as my voice muffles.

I let out a scream
silence is all I could hear
as I see his eyes.

His eyes pierce my soul
tainting that one part of me
that felt always clean.

I took a shower
I took a hundred showers
but it still lingered.

It will be ten years
it will be twenty full years
but I felt empty.

I want to hold you
Whisper in your ears
That 'It'll be ok'.

I want to hold you
Whisper in your ears
That 'you're amazing'.

I want to hold you
Whisper in your ears
'Please don't give up'.

But

If Chinese Whispers
Have taught me anything
All the things I whisper
Will change upon
Entering your eardrums,
Soon 'it'll be ok', will be
'it'll never be ok',
'You're amazing' turns to
'you're nothing', and
'please don't give up',
turns to 'just give up',
But know that no matter
What you hear,
I will always be whispering
Into your ears
'I'm here for you'
and I'll always hold you.

If I admitted what I did last night, most might cringe
as it involves a black object that is about 50 inches,
I won't profess that I had some sort of ***** ***
No, I was on an extreme animated movie binge
And I had snowy mountain equivalent of tissues
Not because I'm riddled with problems and issues
It's because animated movies are tragically beautiful
And though I might not fit into the category of real men,
Because from Superman we learn, real men are steel men
and real men are constituted as muscled men
so by most, I would not be defined as a real man.

Last night I cried with a pair of eyes that grew so red
Not from an outcry that pink eye has finally spread
But from an emotional connection to animation
Because last night, I cried watching The Lion King,
When Simba lost his father, I felt my eyes sting
I cried watching Pixar's inside out
When Bing **** gave his life for his friend
I felt most of all that I had stored inside come out,
It gave me an insight into witnessing depression
And I found myself caught in between the tension,
So last night I felt an emotional connection to animation
And I disposed of many tissues, not out of temptation
From lust filled mind but from animated creations.
So last night, I realised I was more of a real man
Because I expressed how I feel and
That it was ok to cry lake from my eyes
because real men are not steel men
and real men are not required to be muscled men.

Why wait for someday?
Why not make it today?
You can wait for time to pass by
With each second
A different grain of sand
Passing by an hourglass
That captures nothing
But the hours left in our lives.
Wait not for those who cause
Heartache and sadness
But
Let the grains of sand
Cascade to the bottom
Of an hourglass
And the arms of a clock
tick on
As you wait for love.

I don't write because i was told to
I don't write to get richer
I just write because it seems inane
I'm off the grid, off the charts
Just missing every dart
That comes your way
But i will be relentless today
I know everything can make us paranoid
But i'm strong, i can keep up
I will be flamboyant in that notion
My dreams are my truest devotion
You can stare, intimidate and glare
Some of them praise you endlessly and some of them don't even care
That's how life works
If it works at all
Every now and then it slips up
Like a wet floor without a wet floor sign
You see how hard work and success aligns?
Hit that green light