Not sure why I act the way I do.
It's probably due to the fact that I've lost him.
I don't really feel anything anymore.
All those things that used to mean so much, every person who has been with me so long. Don't mean more than a stranger to me. And it doesn't even phase me.
Everything in my life that has vanished has lead me to learn how to be okay with losing anything.
The one who meant everything is now gone and I can't seem to understand how to feel anything anymore.
No matter how many tears are shed it doesn't matter, so I wipe the rivers from my face and tell myself that it just doesn't matter.
When it did matter.
That was the one thing that mattered.
You mattered to me.
You made me feel how I didn't think I could ever feel.
Without you, I no longer feel.
When I was losing you, each limb was slowly  disconnected from my body.
everything stopped, every part of me lost feeling, slowly I learned what it felt like to lose it all.
Now that you're gone, I no longer feel.
You are gone and I am numb.