what a life it is to live in love with an ideal self. to be in love with one who doesn't exist, not even in fiction, only in the realm of your mind. what a life it is to look in the mirror and feel your soul shatter but when you look away, you can pretend you are the version of you that you see in your head. I'm not the only one. I know it. Biographers say that Sylvia Plath was in love with her dream self, encompassed in a strange egotistical fantasy. I live in that same fantasy. How do I make fantasy me the real me?
If you can't tell, I haven't found myself. I know who I want to be, and I think I'm in love with her, but she isn't real.