someone sprayed cologne today in class and it smelled like you 
it brought back all those memories of that abandoned house two streets over where you stole my first kiss
and my second 
and my third
I felt nothing while your lips moved against mine 
not a spark or a flare 
all I felt was the rain sliding off my eyelashes and wind whipping my hair across my forehead 
But you were everywhere 
Your hands traveled down my back and across my arms and face and neck 
To be frank the kiss wasn't the best 
It was wet and rushed and mixed with the nervous beating of my heart 
And no I didn't like you 
No I never wanted to be your girlfriend 
I heard all those stories about you and your ways 
I just liked the feeling of being wanted and adored 
And how you kept my hands warm 
And yes I know that makes me a bad person 
But so are you 
But I know how to change 
I can't say the same for you