I remember the first night we put you on suicide watch.
I remember how you stayed in my room all night long and laid on my bed while I tried to make you believe that I needed you more than anyone else in my life.
That sentence still stands.
I love you.
You're still my best friend.
And being gone during such a huge, hard part of your life is breaking me down.
And I want nothing more than to tell you all this and stay up late talking to you about infinities and the impossible.
And I want to be 5 again.
Back to when you and I were both happy.
And neither of us looked for bottles of pills or busy traffic streets.