hello. you wanted answers to your questions they are bleeding you dry, like so many needling worries do.
I'm calling you to tell you that I don't have anything to say. It's a lie, but I'm too stuck to tell you that the thought of sitting somewhere quiet and cold watching the stars pop out of their black velvet bed as the wind and the cars whip by to turn and look at you your eyes reflecting red and green bound in gold and browns it's the only thing keeping me going, like a thread of ribbon, beautiful delicate stronger than you'd think but lost against the repeating fabric of daily tedium and survival.