I feel a grasp of joy
holding it in my hands
feels to brittle to touch

I feel a weight in my chest
hard to notice if not from within

it all needs to coexist
keeping the lid on
builds my barriers taller

handling it, instead of hiding it
helps me move forward
makes me want to move forward

another year made a piece in my memory lane
nothing like a centerpiece at my own table,
like an accepting and hard working mind

i feel and rejoice in all the good
but i can still tumble and succumb in my past
sometimes i'm the splinter in my own finger

I stand, I sit and I am alive another day
struggling with sleep and remembering dates
writing messages, forgetting to send

I am me.
I will always be me.
though some people have left
they may have left me questioning my own reasoning of friendships

But, here I am
standing strong in a puddle
with a heavy heart full of Love
trying to give myself the time and place to grieve
and I am always working on myself.

Love, Me.