I need help
so I yell and I scream at them
until my lungs give up
and my heart gives out.
silently wishing, hoping
they’ll understand that
I’m not a terrible person.
I’m just hurting
I need help
so I etch the pain into my skin
pleading, begging, praying
for someone to notice the glaring welts
I need help
so I skip one meal
then three
make a chart for the weights
and the calories
waiting to reach the impossible goal
I need help
but I shake in my seat
suffocating in my own lungs
tumbling out of control
I grip my seat so tight my knuckles turn white
wait until
my breath hitches,
my breathing stops