I’ll never forgive
Not just the moments
But the way you made me relive every one of them.
How after all this time I’m forced to claw open the shining scars,
Bleed it back out,
Dive into wounds my mind had closed off,
Drown again,
Become that victim I always swore I’d never be
But had always been.
I’ll never forgive the way, after all this time,
You can still make me bleed,
Make me seethe,
And feel so small.
Make my mind curl against the agony
When all I asked for was you,
But you weren’t real.
I found only a monster behind the bull.
I may never earn love
But I know I never earned this.