There’s a bizarre pleasure To the depressive illusion I want both to be free of it And also cover my head shunning the light of day
My body feels stiff, rigid I want to elongate myself Pulling, cracking, arching But the end feels closer The smaller I become
Aummmmm Nam Myoho Renge Kyo Namaste
It isn’t working. The body is strong The mind and heart They are so weak Resentful of its being A dichotomy of feelings
AummmmmmmMMMMMMMMM Among the pillows I scream it out Croaking, raspy. My ears crave The piercing of My Own Voice
NAM MYOHO RENGE KYO The pressure builds My head buzzes as resonating repetition Rips through my consciousness The body is bored of the effort Just stop
NAMASTE It’s time to get up The end is a long way off
Reach. Breathe. Deeper. That’s it.
Hold. Breathe. Deeper. That’s right.
Feel that? You like that, Don’t you. That feels… Good.
It’s not comfortable It’s not pain It is life.
Some days the memories creep up on me, and the body says, let go, start over. This story is just getting good, you’ll see.