I'm all alone
Its like this world has a way of reminding me of that.
I can fill my life with people
But when I lay down to sleep
Even next to the one I love
I slip into my mind.
Disney never told me
That the knight in shining armor
Can't save me from my nightmares.
Slaying dragons?
Can't you slay my demons?
I'm not locked inside a tower
But I'm locked inside my mind.
Banging on the walls
Screaming to get out.
But you know what?
No one can hear me in there.
The screams drive me nuts
But no one else hears a thing.
You might think I'm crazy
But if you stayed for eternity
You'd go crazy too.
It's unfair of me to put that burden on someone else.
It's unfair to expect that anyone can save me from my thoughts.
It's unfair to expect anyone to understand.
I cling to people hoping that somehow if I hold tight enough
That I can bring them with me.
That the warmth of their touch
Will somehow ward off the cold, dark, endless horror.
That the screaming in my head will silence
Bc I have someone who's finally heard me.
Maybe the demons will stray if they realize I'm not alone.
They taunt me.
Like a school ground fight at the flagpole.
But maybe if someone could stand up for me.
Step into my circle and help me up.
Maybe then they would stop.
Taunting and beating and laughing.
They like to see me fail.
I can't help but think if only I wasn't a failure..
If somehow I'm the one who's supposed to save myself.
If i just stop failing for one second.
Maybe I'm my knight in shining armor.
Why didn't Disney write about that?
I guess "Save yourself" wouldn't be a very good title.
But they would've in turn saved me.