Everyone! Everybody! If you all could shut the hell up For a just one sec, I like to propose a toast.
I’m the designated driver to my friends when they can’t make it home I’m everybody’s therapist really good to talk to without questions or judgement. I’m the priest you confess your sins to because you’re desperate for forgiveness or afraid to have a one-on-one with God. I’m often asked how I’m so lit without any refreshments.
I’m clear as *****. I don’t need anything extra to tell the truth to have a good time to say yes or no.
I can dance my *** off and remember last night was dope. The morning after I grab my bottle of ***** drinking my issues, blessings, and my fun. Sweet as honey going down.
So, if you think I’m lame *******. I’m actually quite the energy ball. If you think I’m better than you get your head out of your ***. At least I don’t act like a fool. You think I can’t hang with you. No. Don’t get the **** twisted; You can’t hang with me if shrinking your liver And burning your lungs like paper is the only thing on your agenda.
I know you have cancer. I have cancer too. We all have it. And it *****.
So we take our meds to treat the symptoms; to feel better to feel like we’re one step closer to curing the illness To feel like everything is going to be alright even when it’s not gonna be.
The difference between you and me is that I take the shots the bartender AKA life pours into my glass. I drink and it’s sweet as honey going down. Clear as *****.
But please! By all means, drink what’s in your glass. Light that **** up. Just leave me and my tall bottle of ***** alone.
Because I am about to get shaken and stirred until I fall the **** out.