I don’t want to beg for you
To love me;
But I gave you so many pieces of me
And one of those was my pride.
Now they’re stockpiled in your storehouse-
Or maybe you threw them away..
You threw me away-
No that’s not true-
I argue with myself over you;
How can I see your face
Your texts
Your pictures
How can I speak to you?
I don’t want to talk
But I can’t stand your silence, it feels violent
I feel assaulted by the words you won’t say
And the feelings you took away, right when I needed them most
And I want to forgive you but once more I feel
Abandoned.
It’s not fair because you’re not physically there but I find you
Striding through my mind like you own the place
Give me space
Give me room to breathe, so I can suffocate in peace
Oxygen feels like it’s clogging my throat
And stifling my mind, I’m walking in a haze
Today’s the first day of what will be many days
Without you.