Crazy,
I still can't say it,
Even though it's been so long,
And I know what you've become,
All the things you've done,
It's like I'm still processing,
Heart so numb,
Maybe I just don't want to admit it,
One of the most important people in my life has become an addict,
I remember when our memories were filled with laughter and light,
Now when the memories come I try to fight,
Knowing your future is no longer bright,
How did this happen?
When did this happen?
Why did this happen?
You used to inspire me,
Now you just fuel the fire in me,
Doing everything in my power to stay away from that same fate,
Praying I didn't inherit that same trait,
And still after all this time,
Thoughts of you forever corrupt my mind,
I wonder if I'll ever get over you,
See it from your point of view,
I could be looking at it all wrong,
In reality,
If you were not the way you are,
I wouldn't be me,
So focused on making something of myself,
Not wanting my life to head south,
Having to make this crucial vow,
Every single day,
So I don't end up the same way,
Maybe,
Just maybe one day,
I'll visit you,
Speak of my adventures,
Tell you I forgive you,
Tell you did your best,
Tell you theres no hard feelings.
Of course I'm still disappointed,
But I'm definitely not mad,
I just sometimes wish we could go back to the days where you were simply,
Dad.