i take a piece from both of my parents
my mothers sensitivity, and longing of the feeling of love.
her hypochondria, and her attitude.
when i was younger i promised id be nothing like her, we always seemed to but heads but as i grow older i see so much of her in me.
i see my father’s manipulative ways in me,
the way i pick people apart until they scream.
i was cursed with his argumentative ways, and his strong opinions.
i watched my father tell my mother she was less of what she was my whole life, and shes wiped her own tears. kept her head high. fed the kids like she was told and washed the dishes when she was done.
they never slept in the same bed. never kissed. never hugged.
when they broke up, i was confused. i thought that was love?
he always made it so clear he never needed her, he rubbed it in her face, and she still stayed. for 9,125 days she stayed. she convinced herself it was love. she convinced herself she was doing the right thing by inhaling his insecurities but she knew it was wrong.
she left.
he broke,
he needed her she didnt need him.
he needed her to hold him together because he was the one who was really broken.
he was feeding off of her and he couldnt stand seeing her not need him.
they broke up 8 years ago and hes never let a woman even come close to taking her place.
watching that taught me to see whats in front of you.
now im proud to be like my mom.