I’ve forgotten a time,
when pain used to hurt.
A time when it didn’t encompass,
my every day and thought.

I’ve forgotten the feeling,
of what hope was like.
Taking for granted the times,
when I just assumed everything would be ok.

I’ve forgotten how to act,
relying on reacting to things instead.
Realizing my defenses are already up,
they are simply just shattered and broken.

I’ve forgotten what happiness feels like,
what living in a moment is.
Every day has just become a struggle,
a fight to make it to the next, and the next.

Pain used to be my measurement,
how I would remember moments.
Now the pain is constant,
and the days are all one.

Love...is a memory,
one I can’t quite trust.
I think I had it once,
but perhaps it was just a lessening of pain.

Perhaps tomorrow I’ll remember,
if tomorrow should come.
Or perhaps the pain will end,
and I will have to decide which is worse.