I believe at some point in my life I drilled the idea of being non comital in my head.
Crazy I know but I was so hell bent on not being hurt again.
Surely being a non emotional being means I HAVE NOTHING to gain.
I get it.
But I always stressed that I'm going to commit to those that need my heart.
Not the people that want to ****** with it and then suddenly disappear because their heart isn't solid enough to handle mine.

While in this situation of non commitment. I also believed in soul mates.
The sole idea that there will always be someone for you, that at the end of the day love is our fate.
It's our destiny.
And that's good enough to keep my concept of love sane and not in vain.
But as the pain of heart break coursed  through my veins, it became difficult to hold on to that thought.
It's weird I know, but it's perfectly human.
To have mismatched feelings and contradictions.
But you must understand, I know you've experienced the same things.

To have the whole of you belong to someone who couldn't properly cater for it.
To over and under-assume that they are your one and only.
It's sensible, we are human.
It's the only humane thing ever.

Now this story is long.
I want to apologise but I know you love some story telling.
So I'm here to tell a tale so please hear me out.

When I saw you.
I don't want to say corny things like my heart skipped a beat.
But it did, and it was weird because I didn't know how to react to that.
My hands were clammy, My mind was running.
How can I talk to this royalty and have her find me funny and adorable.
How can I make her smile?
How can I hear her laugh and feel prideful because "I did that"

Remarkable.
Undoubtedly, How I felt then is ten times more than now.
You have no idea how much my heart belongs to you.
How every fibre in me tells me you're my soul mate.
My sole mate.

It's my dream to take care of you.
To show you love and make you feel everything that you make me feel.
I want to watch you grow and become the successful Queen you're meant to be.
I want to be there by your side as you battle each demon, as you win and as you lose to become stronger.
I want to be there for you.
Every single step.

I want to hold your soft hands
And instantaneously transfer how much I am willing to protect and make you feel safe.
While also demonstrating the safety I immediately feel with each hold.

I want to be in an endless timeframe and watch you wake up.
I want to be the first t see those russet eyes, glow with happiness.
I want to leave butterfly kisses on your forehead and watch your subtle smile spread.
I want to whisper sweet nothings and hug you.
My mornings are best with you.
My soul feels complete knowing I'm with my sole soul mate.