I want to wake up in the morning and have it gone.
I want to wake up slip my clothes on without feeling your hands tangled around me
Brush my hair without having to swat away the prints pressuring around my hips

If I could
I'll burn this vessel

Give me a lobotomy
I'm ready to risk it all for it to be gone.


I dream about what my world would be like if it never happened.
If your midnight hovering never came.
If the shame never quaked my legs and suffocated my peace.

But still every night I go to bed with wishful thoughts
hopeful that it'll be gone in the morning
and wake up in disappointment when the feeling returns