You tried to pull a gun on me. I just pulled mine faster But what you don't know is Three days later I put my gun to my head. I couldn't live with the fact That I almost pulled the trigger on you That I was ready to stop your threat. What you don't know is one month later I still had nightmares That I overdosed on pills Hoping to never wake up. Six months later I still see your face I still think of the what ifs One year later I still wake up screaming Fighting your invisible threat. One year and six months later You voice still haunts me. You were eager to **** be because I wore a badge and gun.
My coworkers ***** me. Two against me. What you two didnt see The detectives interrogated me. Told me I asked for it I should have fought back One day later the detective picks me up I tried over dosing minutes before they came They noticed the cuts but didn't notice That I was falling fast I couldn't keep my eyes open. My speech was slurring I walked like i was drunk I made it through the **** kit I got home and slept for three days straight One month later i quit my job. My body couldn't handle the stress I kept dissociating. Six months later I still couldn't have ***. I started learning jujitsu I had bought a gun One year later I was more confident But i still feared *** I feared men I still had nightmares Two years later I'm still managing to struggle I still hear your voices Still see your faces Still feel you in my dreams Two years and six months later I'm more confident. I still have difficulty with men. But now I am well on my way to be a police officer An EMT I can't let you win! Ever!