I am finally being forced to deal
with limitations, my mind has set.

So, what does that mean?
I spent a life of heavy determination, littered with no’s
Fighting my body while it screamed that I’d do it anyway.
And I did.
I was astounding, gregarious,
Fearless.
Momentum passed brain chemistry.

This ‘no’ is different.
And it’s lingering
And it hurts.
There is no work harder and achieve.
There is no scream and endure.
There is no getting around this.

No one cares if I get stable
No one cares if I medicate.
It’s a no, that stays a ‘no’
No matter if I promise to change.


I deal
and I have no choice,
but to pull my head out of falling embers.
This residual loss, I watch
my dream as it shatters.
Fading flames can’t catch my attention.
Barely an adult,
and I am carrying around a life sentence.