i only miss you when i'm almost sleeping
and i have thought of you often tonight

how it used to feel sliding into the sheets at night
red tartan fleece won at your office Christmas party
the first thing that was ever ours
cold at first until you were beside me
barriers made between us by pillows
but our noses still touch in the darkness
my fingers hold the soft hair behind your ears
and i stare at you under northern lights
your eyes close and i wonder what you'll dream of tonight
and if i can save you from it if i have to
your warm breath in my face
i breathe it in like oxygen
filling my lungs with you
safe from beneath our comfort blanket

memories vivid like they were moments ago
visions fade and my eyes burn
i'm here alone in my own sheets
plain white and cotton
wondering how i survived this many nights without you
holding my breath