I introduced myself to you a short while back
I’m the man with fangs for teeth, who lies in a coffin by day and roams the earth by night

I’ve seen some sights in my 500 years, most of them not pretty
The strangest of them occurred this evening, whilst roaming in the City

I was looking for some sweet blood to save me from dying
Sweet, warm blood, just my type, a sign of a human being ready and ripe

Ripe for the picking, for my tea, a nip of the neck to set me free
First a nip, then I ****, until the blood is drained, the human runs out of luck but me well I’m Mr Lucky

Well I guess my luck is wearing thin, or I found someone of my match
A blonde beauty oh how I much desired, threw herself right at me and I almost fell in the fire

We were sat lounging in a bar in the Cavern, it is of course our local Tavern
Her eyes found me across the room, I lost all my senses and started to swoon

She batted her eyelids and lashes and called me by my name
I tried to speak but couldn’t fathom a reply, all I could do was open my mouth and sigh

She wiggled her finger at me beckoning me to her side
I blushed and went over to see what she wanted, I had no idea I was so vain, and at this moment in time feeling a little insane.

She told me she loved me and wanted to wed, then for me to take her home and share with her, my bed
I was flattered, and loving thoughts rampaged through my head

I got down on one knee, like the gent that I am, and asked her to wed me tonight
She said that she would and showed great delight, then kissed me on my lips

A little nip she gave before her lips left mine, it didn’t matter, it tasted divine, like a good full bodied red wine

We married in haste, eager to get home to bed, all impure thoughts running through my head

When we got to my room it became suddenly clear, it wasn’t my bed she wanted to share
She had designs on my blood within, she was going to **** me dry, make me pay for all my sins

It was suddenly clear that she wasn’t very nice, the words from her mouth dripped full of lies, the blood that ran through her veins as cold as ice

I would not suffer or give in, I needed 500 more years to carry on with my sins
I hatched a plan to save my skin, I needed to be quick, my skin is thin

Thin skin and a pale face, blood red eyes and fangs for teeth
My thoughts turned to hate, and I started to seethe


In the Kitchen I opened a bottle of full bodied red, called her to share it with me by the open fire
I declared my love for her and told her she was my heart’s desire

She was bewitched and flattered, mesmerised by with my words
I looked her in the eyes and bent forward for a kiss,
I missed and fell forward, stumbling and pushing the little minx,
She let out a cry and tried to steady herself on the kitchen sink

Alas, it was not to be, suddenly she fell into the fire, my love, my only desire
Turned to black and faded away, maybe she’ll reform and come back another day
This time with love and warmth in her eyes, then we could give it a go, see if it is possible for Two Vampire to own a soul.

For now, I am free to continue to roam, in the City I call home.