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Apr 2018
I feel like I’m choking on words
Like the thoughts in my head are there, but I can’t let them out
I can’t let them escape
So I grasp onto the little hope that I have left
But I’m growing old and slowly, but surly letting my emotions unfold
They just cave in
I cave in
I feel like I’m drowning
******* take me push me under until I can’t breathe
Swallowing the water making me a little less empty
Hold me down soon I’ll perish I’m fading out
You all wanted honesty?
I’m drowning completely now
I don’t know what to say most of the time
I hold back until I relapse and feel numb inside
There’s so much on my mind, but people don’t want to hear it most of the time
Often they say they care, but truly aren’t there when I’m dying on the inside
All you see or understand is what’s on the outside
You’re all only there when in need or despair    
That’s why I write because at least the sheets hear me when I’m tearing my eyes out over the pages
Ink bleeds, but better that than me
It would be nice for someone to understand me and appreciate what I have to offer and mean to be
Feeling lost and every so lonely
But lately I haven’t even seen the mirrored self image of myself clearly
I’m lost
I’m blanked out
All the colors of life turning into dark storm clouds
Can you see now as rain trickles down
I need you all now before time runs out
I’m getting tired out my eyes mostly closed
I can’t escape the words in my head that clutter about
As my pen loses ink
Am I a poet now?
Whenever we suffer a physical or emotional trauma, it is said that part of our soul flees the body in order to survive the experience. With every cut or wound our essence and vitality grows weaker.
Brian Hoffman
Written by
Brian Hoffman  24/M/New York
(24/M/New York)   
       Maria Hernandez, ---, S Olson, Weeping willow and ---
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