What has this boy done to me?
Life would be so much easier if I could just
forget he ever existed and go back to how things were.
I wouldn't have to worry about time zones
or having to get up early
or go to sleep late
or getting money to travel
or the lonely heartache I feel when we hang up.
I wouldn't have to worry about schedules
or the time it takes to mail a package there
or if we communicate well
or if I'm a good girlfriend
or the distant but ever-present doubts that this won't work out
and it's all a waste of time.
What has he done to me?
But then I look in his eyes...
and see his smile,
and hear his laugh.
What has he done to me?
Because suddenly none of those other things matter that much.
They all become bearable at the sound of his voice.
Everything is worth it at every "I love you," uttered,
at every "We can do this, we can make it."
sent at 2 in the morning.
All the troubles fade at the promise
of the future being better than today.
Being better than the hypothetical today in which
he, and all the pain, never existed.
I've come to truly believe this.
And I choose to endure the pain.
What has he done to me?