Do you ever feel like you want sadness?
Like wet wood that would like to be lit
But it will burn to death if it was
Do you ever want to have a feeling
With tears running down your cheek
Because it is the only way to know
You can still feel?

Do you ever just want to feel like
Your jumping into an ocean of ink
Because it's better than just feeling "fine"?
Or "good"? Or even anger, because you know
That anger will eventually turn into shame
For the things you said
Or the words you didn't utter

Do you ever just hunger for a feeling
of choking on emotion that left you
a voice mail and you were too scared
to answer but your ready to call back
Do you ever just want to crumble into
The flames of depression because
it's more comfortable than the feeling
of your emotions withering away to ash


Do you ever just want to drown
in your tears, because its better than
feeling numb to the events in your life
Or lack thereof, so school and therapy
are the only interactions with humans you have
And going out of that room will be
meaningless because you have no
plans today like always so the only
Event you can have is
A panic attack or feeling suicidal

Do you ever just want to be depressed
Because it is easier to identify
Like wet wood that would like to be lit
Because burning alive is better than the chill of just surviving