or second
or third
or ever



I lay in bed at night and think back to that fight that made you scream your lungs out at me for being a mixture of broken pieces glued together. I don't blame you


You hated that I needed assurance everytime you said you loved me but I couldn't help it because love had never been my closest friend,
it never acknowledged my existence long enough to stick around longer than the sunrise


You never understood why I declined hanging out with your friends I never understood either but my cousin from out of town called anxiety came to visit and I felt obligated to spend time with him
I never liked my cousins from out of town

You told me to start loving myself and that I couldn't ever love anyone if I didn't love myself the most, but
Loving you is taking all the love that I can't give myself and putting it to good use
Loving you makes me cancel plans with my cousin from out of town
You can hold my hand while I learn to love myself
You can kiss my cheeks while I heal
You can stick around longer than the sunrise