I think I've finally come to understand that there are two types of happiness,
of the Heart and of the Head.

Happiness of the Head
I can make for myself.
Look at that sunshine,
feel the kiss of a breeze,
hear the voices of friends,
We're alive!
I just want to scream.

Happiness of the Heart doesn't work like that though. You don't have to work to be happy in your Heart.
Happiness of the Heart just is.
To not have to manufacture happiness, to just, thoughtless, have it be-
I don't remember what that feels like.

Today, at long last,
my Head will mourn for happiness of the Heart,
because in my Heart, I know that that happiness is dead.
Never to rise again.